52 pages • 1 hour read
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“Feyi had already decided who she wanted to be that night, so she stared right back at him, unabashed, drinking in his terra-cotta skin and dark copper beard.”
This early quote shows the reader the strength of Feyi’s character. Despite going through grief and recovering from trauma, she decides who she wants to be and goes for it. It also highlights the power of Feyi’s feminine sexuality. Throughout the book, she is confident and aware of her beauty and its effect on people.
“Feyi felt like a monster and a traitor, but it was fine, it had to happen.”
It has been five years since her husband has passed, and Feyi’s almost casual thought while having sex for the first time since Jonah’s death is important in that it shows just how deep and raw her grief still is. It also shows her rationalizing her actions, but in such a half-hearted way that it convinces no one, including herself, establishing the need for Feyi to heal to find love again.
“I think we’re just figuring out how to survive a world on fire…that it’s okay to be alive.”
Feyi knows the path out of her darkness from the very beginning: to be alive with someone else and to accept that she is alive without Jonah without guilt. Here, however, she knows the answer but is not able to manifest it, as she has not met a partner who understands and can survive with her.
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By Akwaeke Emezi
African Literature
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Art
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Grief
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LGBTQ Literature
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Mortality & Death
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