You Are Your Best Thing: Vulnerability, Shame Resilience, and the Black Experience

Tracey Michae’l Lewis-Giggetts opens by examining the figure of the Black church lady—a woman who holds a position of power and morality within the church while projecting shame upon other women in the church. Lewis-Giggetts argues that the church lady’s shame is never about the action itself, but rather is based in the publicness of an act and the failure to maintain secrecy. Lewis-Giggetts grew up in the church and learned early on that her value was tied to her ability to deny the self and promote a patriarchal understanding of God. She learned to be quiet and to protect herself by believing she was of little value. As a girl, Lewis-Giggetts was molested, and her family’s relationship with religion places her as the protagonist of a complex shame narrative.

Lewis-Giggetts explains that work on shame often leaves out the ways systemic oppression affects Black women and girls. Even if Black women engage in a process of healing and a denial of shame, the society they live in demands that they devalue themselves and their survival demands they conform. Religion requires certainty, and that assuredness is held in place by shame.