50 pages • 1 hour read
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Adam is the protagonist of Words on Bathroom Walls. He was diagnosed with schizophrenia a few years before the book’s opening. Since then, hallucinations have been a constant presence in his life, and his greatest desire is to “feel properly alone” (10). While Adam dislikes his hallucinations, he also sees a certain beauty in the ones that don’t feel harmful, such as Rebecca and the choir he sometimes hears. Over the course of the book, Adam realizes that while he may never fully stop having hallucinations, he doesn’t need to be ashamed of the fact that his brain is atypical.
Adam is isolated for much of the book, partly due to stigma around mental illness and partly due to his own choices. Adam’s former friends stopped talking to him after his diagnosis, so Adam believes everyone will react the same way—ditching him because they fear his illness. To protect himself, Adam keeps everyone at a distance, even people he genuinely cares about. He assumes that his stepfather Paul hates him when Paul displays fear about Adam’s diagnosis. Also, even after getting close to Maya and Dwight, Adam cannot really imagine being vulnerable enough with them to tell them about his disease.
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