Wink

It’s Monday, the first school day after the memes went viral. Ross is on the lookout for the person who made the memes; he considers every student with a phone a suspect, though Jimmy seems most likely.

In “Batpig vs the Anonymous Troll” (142), a troll bombards a town with insults. Batpig comes to save the townspeople and finds the troll hiding under a rock, flinging out mean comments. He tries to lure out the troll, but nothing works until he makes the troll a peanut butter milkshake. The troll asks, “Is that Jif? I’m coming out!” (142). It isn’t Jif, however; it’s generic peanut butter, which is Batpig’s form of punishment. The troll, no longer anonymous, learns to be more pleasant after a lot of shaming from others.

Ross enters Ms. Bayer’s class, feeling agitated. Jimmy mocks him loudly for playing the guitar. Ross recalls the Death meme and, without warning, hurls his textbook at Jimmy. It hits him in the neck. Jimmy’s customary wad of gum flies out of his mouth, and he drops his bottle of saliva, spilling its contents. The attack causes a brawl between the boys.

Ross’s emotions explode in the chaos; he covers his face to hide his tears and suppress his sobs. The rest of the students stare in shock, including a horrified Sarah. Ross yells at his classmates to stop looking at him. He wishes he could bury himself under the classroom floor tiles and die. He sketches a tombstone standing on black and white checkered tiles. The epitaph says, “Here Lies Dumb Ross” (146).

“Batpig vs The Bully” shows the superhero battling a giant, smelly bully (147). He zaps his enemy with sarcastic comments so potent that they make the bully retreat. The narrator exclaims that Batpig saved the day. Batpig says, “Just throw up a statue for me. We’ll call it even” (147).

Ross and Jimmy sit outside the principal’s office holding ice packs over their injuries. Ms. Bayer is inside the office, angrily recounting the fight to the principal. Ross and Jimmy bicker, with Ross making accusations and Jimmy answering them. Jimmy’s answers seem to prove his innocence to Ross, but Ross says the opposite out loud.

Principal Kingsley invites the boys to enter after Ms. Bayer exits. Kingsley listens to each side of the story and shows more interest in the memes than in the fight. Jimmy maintains his innocence. Kingsley asks Ross to show him the memes, which Ross does, using his phone. Kingsley says he understands why Ross was furious. Jimmy asks to see the images; initially surprised, he then looks hurt and says to Ross, “Those are brutal. You thought I’d do that?” (151).

Kingsley blames the fight on the person who made the memes. He doles out some light consequences but warns them to say he put them on “Triple Super Severe Probation” to appease Ms. Bayer’s outrage. He asserts that both the boys are victims and then pretends that he’s scolding them as they leave the office. Outside Bayer’s classroom door, Ross begins to apologize to Jimmy, but Jimmy interrupts him. He says that the memes “sucked,” but he also promises to give Ross a real beating sometime.

The next month goes by quickly in a series of radiation side effects, memorable conversations, and guitar practice. Ross says the skin between his right eye and his ear “starts to look like a honey-baked ham” (154), which he sketches. He has to apply ointment to his face constantly, and it leaves a greasy residue everywhere. He gets excruciatingly painful ulcers on the white of his eye; he uses another ointment for that problem, and the substance drips wherever he goes.

In “Batpig vs The Goop” (157), the eye goop is oozing through town, nauseating people, staining everything it touches, and making the ground too slippery for walking. Batpig defeats this menace with a solvent called “Eye-Goop-Gone.” He agrees with the narrator’s exclamation that Batpig rules in the final frame. All the goop can say is “Whimper.”

One week after the memes appear, a conversation with Sarah distracts Ross from his health problems. As she prepares to ride her skateboard home, she asks him about his symptoms. She compliments his hat, but he confesses he hates it. When Sarah answers with a shrug and raised eyebrows, Ross feels like she’s ridiculing him. The brief feeling disappears when Sarah smiles. As she rolls away, Sarah jokingly pretends she’s about to fall off the skateboard.

Ross’s guitar lessons continue at Frank’s house, where he meets Denny, the drummer and Jimmy’s cousin. Ross develops calluses that impress Frank, and as Ross’s technique improves, Frank teaches him how to do scales. His incessant practice irritates Linda, whereas Ross’s father enjoys listening to him play: He comes into Ross’s bedroom, puts his feet on the bed, closes his eyes, and rarely winces when Ross plays the wrong notes. Ross draws his father’s feet, with movement lines showing the right foot tapping a rhythm to music notes, a couple of which are crooked.

On Thanksgiving day, Ross’s father notices the sketchbook cover that belonged to Ross’s mother. He asks Ross if he may look inside, but when Ross hesitates, he expresses understanding: Ross is using the sketchbook exactly like his mother used it. Ross’s father reminisces about her love of Thanksgiving and her incredible mashed potatoes.

Abby helps Ross learn chords and gives him sheet music of Vampire Weekend songs. Ross isn’t a fan, but the band’s music has been a part of his life for years. One song contains an F chord, which is still too difficult for him. Ross complains about the chord to Frank, who assures Ross that he also had trouble playing it, like every beginner. Ross declares the F chord a conspiracy to exclude musicians who aren’t dedicated; Frank thinks it’s not a bad theory. Ross asks whether there’s a trick to producing the same sound more easily, but all Frank advises is constant practice. Ross grumbles.

Ross’s family sets up the fake Christmas tree. In the tree’s box, Ross discovers the letter he wrote to future Ross on the previous Christmas. Past Ross asks his future self how he is, teases himself about Sarah becoming his girlfriend, wishes him an awesome year and good holiday, and asks him to say “hi” to Abby and Isaac. Ross reflects that one year can make a big difference.