Unorthodox: The Scandalous Rejection of My Hasidic Roots

In Deborah’s quest for her identity, one of the major obstacles she encounters is the dual pressure of pleasing both God and her Satmar community. Within the community, the pressure to please others is two-fold: first, one must please God by abiding by the strict rules outlined by the community, and second, one must show one’s faithfulness.

Deborah is taught from the outset that to please God she must adhere to the rules of the Satmar community. These rules are specific and different from other Jewish communities. For example, the Satmar community does not support Zionism or Israel, and they believe their Ashkenazi descent makes them superior to Sephardic Jews. Furthermore, within the Satmar community, God is only pleased with the observance of the rituals such as modest dress for women, separation of genders unless married, preference of speaking Yiddish over English, and focus on marriage and childbearing at a young age. Upholding such traditions is crucial to the Satmar way of life and distinguishes this community of believers.

Deborah’s account signals that pleasing fellow members of the Satmar community is equally important as pleasing God. Events such as the annual rabbi’s dance are important places for people to make an appearance.