Three Little Words

An international bestseller, Ashley Rhodes-Courter’s 2008 memoir, Three Little Words, provides a moving account of her early life in the foster care system. Ashley is born to a teenage mother, Lorraine, who is not well placed to look after her. After her mother’s new partner, Dusty, moves in, things soon deteriorate. When the family moves to Florida, Lorraine and Dusty are both arrested, and Ashley is placed in foster care along with her younger brother, Luke.

Ashley believes that she will soon be living with her mother again, but no caregivers offer her any information or answer her questions. She and Luke go to live with Mr. and Mrs. Hines, but Ashley is soon moved on because of supposed behavioral issues. She is quickly uprooted again before staying briefly with Mr. and Mrs. Ortiz, who recognize her intelligence and allow her to start kindergarten early. Dusty visits and reveals that Lorraine is in prison.

Ashley and Luke move in with their maternal grandfather and his partner, Adele. Their grandfather is sometimes drunk and abusive to Adele, but Adele herself is loving and generous and dotes on the children. For a while, their lives are relatively happy, but when their grandfather is arrested for drunk driving, their position becomes precarious again. Adele fights to keep the children, but when their grandfather is shot in an argument about a car sale, they are returned to the foster care system.

Ashley and Luke move into a cramped foster home, but Adele receives her foster care license, and they are soon back in her care. However, it is not to last, and without explanation, they are once again returned to Florida. Ashley stays briefly with the Potts family, although it is later revealed that Mr. Potts has been accused of child sexual abuse. Ashley is relocated to the Hagens’ home and receives a visit from her mother, who promises that she will get her act together to look after her soon. The Hagens close their foster home, and Ashley is moved on to another, this time with Luke.

Ashley and Luke move into an overcrowded trailer with Mr. and Mrs. Moss and several other foster children. Mrs. Moss is extremely abusive, regularly punishing the children for imagined transgressions by making them drink hot sauce, run laps in the hot sun, go without food, or stand in pressure positions. Although people do occasionally investigate reports of abuse, they end up believing Mrs. Moss’s appearance as a caring and understanding foster mother and fail to follow up on their investigations. When Ashley’s caseworker finally takes her away from the Mosses, he accuses her of lying to cause trouble for the Mosses, insisting that they are a model foster family.

When Ashley moves into a children’s shelter, she reports the Mosses to anyone she can, and people finally listen. From the shelter, she goes to Luke’s new foster family, the Merritts, although she cannot fully relax, believing it is only a matter of time before she is moved again. Ashley and Luke meet their Guardian ad Litem, Mary Miller, who is the first person to actually ask what she can do for them. Later, Ashley will realize how much Mary truly does to secure their futures. However, the first indication of this is Mary making the difficult decision to push for Lorraine’s parental rights to be terminated. When she is successful, Ashley is officially made an orphan.

Ashley and Luke move into the Children’s Home of Tampa. The staff are supportive and kind, and the children are well cared for. Families come in, looking for children to adopt, but even after a year, no one has expressed an interest in Ashley and Luke. However, Ashley meets Phil and Gay Courter at an adoption picnic and eventually learns that they wish to adopt her, while another family who lives close by wishes to adopt Luke. Ashley gradually gets to know the Courters, visiting their home and going on a family holiday where she meets their adult children, Josh and Blake. Eventually, she moves in with them full-time.

Ashley remains wary and is reluctant to let herself open up to being loved or loving others. Although Gay and Phil express their love for her, Ashley feels a need to stay true to her mother and love no one else. Slowly, she lets down her defenses. They attend court together and make the adoption legal and official. Gay contacts Lorraine, and eventually Ashley and her mother exchange letters, although these often lead to highs of excitement and crashes of disappointment and discontent. Ashley eventually meets with her mother and her new half-sister, although the reunion is strained and uncomfortable.

A friend persuades Ashley to put sleeping tablets in Phil’s and Gay’s drinks so that they can sneak out of the house and meet boys. Although Phil and Gay are furious, Ashley also realizes that they are not going to abandon her, and she begins to allow herself to trust and love them. She also learns that Mrs. Moss has been arrested for child abuse. Ashley is determined to become involved in the case and ends up filing lawsuits against the abusive woman. Mrs. Moss pleads guilty to one case of neglect and receives a miniscule sentence. The results of Ashley’s own cases against her are similarly limited.

However, Ashley settles into life with the Courters and begins to feel truly secure and loved. She embraces numerous opportunities, including speaking at events in support of children in foster care, meeting J.K. Rowling, and attending a Christmas party at the White House. Slowly, she accepts her place in her new family and builds relationships with her biological family, including her mother. She still resents Mrs. Moss and the negligent workers who allowed her and others to abuse and neglect the children in their care, and she remains determined to use her position and her voice to speak out for children in foster care.