This Is Going to Hurt: Secret Diaries of a Junior Doctor

Content Warning: This section of the guide includes discussion of illness and death, addiction, and suicidal ideation.

In 2016, six years after leaving the medical profession, Adam Kay discovered the diaries he kept as a junior doctor. At the time, politicians in the UK were criticizing junior doctors for striking due to contractual changes. The author hoped that publishing his diaries would give the public an insight into the extreme stress that junior doctors experience.

Kay came from a family of doctors. When he was 16, he chose the A levels required to study medicine without much thought. He explains that the professional hierarchy of doctors is “House Officer, senior House Officer (SHO), registrar, senior registrar, consultant” (4). All doctors are categorized as “junior” until they become consultants. After six years studying at Imperial College, London, Kay became a House Officer. His day shifts involved following senior doctors on the wards and completing numerous administrative tasks. During night shifts, however, he was in charge of the inpatients in the wards while the senior doctors handled ER patients. At these times, Kay and other junior doctors faced continual, challenging emergencies.

Tuesday, 3 August 2004 - Sunday, 17 October 2004

On Kay’s first day at work, he discovered that the email address assigned to him was incorrect, spelling his name as “atom.