The Reptile Room

Lemony Snicket notes that regret is difficult and that for years Klaus will regret not calling out for the taxi driver to stop and take Count Olaf away. However, the children were too stunned to act quickly, and the cab was gone before they could even speak. Stephano/Count Olaf asks the children to carry his suitcase inside. The children announce that they know he’s Count Olaf, so they will not help him, let alone allow him inside the house. Count Olaf’s façade cracks, and he threatens to hurt the children, which he’s proven before he is capable of doing, if they don’t obey him. Fearing for their safety, the children carry the suitcase inside. After Count Olaf extracts a knife from his pocket and threatens to cut off one of Sunny’s toes, the children then retreat to the Reptile Room. They’re not sure how he found them, but they’re also not exactly surprised.

Violet wants to call Mr. Poe, but Klaus points out that Mr. Poe didn’t believe them last time about Count Olaf being dangerous until it was almost too late, so he probably won’t believe them now if they claim that Count Olaf has reappeared in disguise. Klaus suggests they run away, but Violet points out they have no money (at least not that’s accessible to them for four years). Plus, Count Olaf and his theater minions will probably find them again somehow if they run off. She thinks they should just tell Uncle Monty when he gets home, who is more likely to believe them than Mr. Poe.

Uncle Monty arrives home with a car full of supplies for the trip. Stephano offers to carry the canoe inside, and Uncle Monty orders Klaus to help Stephano. Klaus protests and tries to explain who Stephano really is, but Uncle Monty insists and is too distracted to listen to Klaus. Klaus goes to help Stephano, and Violet nearly seizes the opportunity to tell Uncle Monty who Stephano really is. However, she notices Stephano wielding the knife, silently threatening to harm her brother if she says anything. Therefore, she says nothing.

Count Olaf/Stephano continues to threaten the Baudelaires for the entire night, keeping watch outside his bedroom door so they can’t sneak past to talk to Uncle Monty. The children feel lonely sleeping in separate rooms and wish they could talk to each other.

In the morning, Uncle Monty notes how early Stephano was awake and how much work he is already getting done. The children attempt again to discuss Stephano, and Uncle Monty agrees that Stephano is suspicious, indicating they should talk outside. Once they’re alone, Uncle Monty reveals that he is one of the top herpetologists in the world, and many people envy him. He relates a story about how, once when he discovered a new species in college, his roommate was so envious that he ate the specimen. Stephano seems overly eager and asks a lot of questions, so Uncle Monty assumes he’s really a spy from the Herpetological Society, here to steal his work and take credit for it. For this reason, Stephano should not be allowed to come on the trip. Klaus says again that Stephano is Count Olaf, but Monty thinks Klaus means this as a metaphor. Monty destroys Stephano’s boat ticket, but only because of his own concerns. Klaus again tries to explain the reality, but Monty won’t let him interrupt. Suddenly, a lamp flies out of a window and strikes Uncle Monty on the shoulder, throwing the conversation off.

Uncle Monty recognizes the lamp fell out of Klaus’s room, and he assumes that Klaus’s irresponsible placement of the lamp is at fault. Klaus insists he keeps the lamp far from the window, but Monty doesn’t believe him, ordering Klaus to put the lamp back in his room in a safer location. Violet leads her siblings away to do this. On the way, the children encounter Count Olaf in the hallway. The children inform him that he won’t be coming to Peru with them. Count Olaf, angered, responds that he will be because accidents can change circumstances. The children don’t know what Count Olaf plans to do, but they pick up on a sinister vibe.