25 pages • 50 minutes read
The Rememberer
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Themes
Thought Versus Feeling
Thoughts and feelings are often depicted in binary opposition, which is part of the legacy of the Enlightenment. At this point in history, religion is replaced with science, and rational logic is privileged over other ways of understanding the world, including humanity. Because feelings and emotions often fail rational explanation, they are typically maligned. However, even in a post-Enlightenment world that rests on logical thought, there have always been detractors who question the use of logic, especially when feelings still seem to have power.
Ben is one such detractor who values feeling or “heart” over thoughts and smarts. His complaint that “we’re all getting too smart” (Paragraph 8) takes issue with the concept of human progress, which imagines a world in which humans develop complete control over the world, presumably through the mastery of all knowledge. He sees that the result of this perpetual intelligence and knowledge has dried up the world and even killed it because thought has not been balanced out with heart. As globalization, digital technology, and consumption of information enable people to become points of data, Ben’s worry speaks to generations who express anxiety over the end point of human progress, or the absolute privileging of thought.
Bender’s story illustrates the importance of feelings, specifically because they are able to make meaning when thought or logic fails. Ben’s transformation into various animals makes no logical sense, but Annie must navigate this reality anyway. Her love for Ben and even her grief over her loss support her changed relationship far more than the information she gets from the professor. Thoughts and feelings are shown not to necessarily be oppositional, but rather alternating viewpoints that both help people make sense of the senseless.
Love and Obligation
When Ben becomes an ape, Annie does all she can to understand him. She sits, face to face with him and tries to soothe him by petting the fur on the back of his hand. When Ben turns into a sea turtle, she makes sure he has salt water. Annie admits that she “didn’t even really care, then, not at first,” about Ben’s regression (Paragraph 14). She is focused, solely, on being a faithful companion to her partner, no matter what form he takes.
Yet, despite her sincere desire to devote herself to Ben’s ever-changing needs, Annie is clearly experiencing grave caretaking stress. She reveals that she paces the halls and chews “whole packs of gum in mere minutes” (Paragraph 16). She cries and takes part in no activities outside of work other than caring for Ben. The only human interaction the reader sees her have after Ben changes is with a grumpy college professor. Even then, she only meets with the instructor to figure out how to better help Ben. If Annie has any outside hobbies or interests, the reader is left unaware of them. She becomes increasingly isolated, thinking only of herself in relation to Ben’s predicament.
Bender depicts the tension of love as it manifests in a sense of obligation. Annie loves Ben, and therefore never questions her responsibility of caring for him, even as that care shifts from that of a lover to that of a parent or pet owner. This shift comes with changing expressions of love and new frustrations. Yet rather than depict this tension with high conflict and drama, Bender merely shows moments of Annie’s decision to set a limit to her obligations. Annie’s first limit is set when Ben, recently transformed into an ape, reaches out to her as if he wants to be sexually intimate. She says “no” loudly, and he respects her boundary. Finally, Annie reaches the “limit of [her] limits” (Paragraph 19) once Ben becomes a salamander and she realizes that he will eventually disappear into the water. She does not want to risk not being able to find him, so she decides she can no longer care for him. These limits to obligation enable to Annie to keep loving Ben and challenge the notion that love, even unconditional love, means unconditional obligation.
The Sublime Quality of Loss
To describe something as sublime is to identify that something is so great, so awe-inspiring, as to almost create pain. Typically used to describe the overwhelming experience a person has when in the presence of beautiful art or landscapes, sublime attends those experiences that escape words, especially as one has any number of feelings all at once. Such is the quality of loss that Bender explores in “The Rememberer.”
Ben’s transformation is so absurd that it strikes Annie as barely notable. She says she didn’t even “really care” (Paragraph 13) and fully commits herself to the relationship as if his being an ape is totally typical: they sit “on the lawn together and ripped up the grass” (Paragraph 14). Yet Annie reflects that she “didn’t realize he wasn’t coming back” (Paragraph 14), which reflects the way that the beauty, absurdity, or uniqueness of an experience can distract from the reality of how the experience has fundamentally changed reality. Annie has lost Ben, but his transformation is so wild that the realness of the loss that it signifies is experienced with pleasure.
Once Annie reaches her limit of limits, she not only acknowledges that she has lost Ben—and that he’s been lost for a while—but she also takes ownership of severing the remains of the relationship when she takes him to the ocean. The ocean is often an image that frequents descriptions of the sublime, as it is immensely beautiful, mysterious, and dangerous all at once. Annie surrenders Ben to the ocean, and with him surrenders her love to the full experience of loss. Her final gesture of waving with both arms points to a wild grief, but also a wild freedom that Annie finally has.
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