59 pages • 1 hour read
“But I’ll never belong the way Matty does. I only fit with him because we’ve been this way forever, from when our moms used to drink tea at his house every day. He doesn’t see me how everyone else does. He doesn’t notice that none of his friends ever talk to me. And because he’s Matty, because everyone wants him to like them, they don’t say what they really think. They just pretend I’m not there. It’s not something a few years and some jello will change.”
April and Matty have grown up together, making their romantic relationship the next step in their intertwined lives. Yet April’s musical aspirations mean she doesn’t belong in this small-town environment the way that Matty does. Likewise, she doesn’t envision her future self as Matty does, and everyone senses it except Matty, who is so comfortable in their relationship that he sees it from beginning to end without question. Their relationship is the baseline for the novel’s exploration of The Nature of Romantic Relationships.
“It feels like I’m starving without a guitar. If I still had mine, I wouldn’t notice the cold in the campground and I wouldn’t feel hungry right now. I could play until my fingers throbbed and then walk around with fresh indents in my calluses to help me remember that the world can disappear and I can float in sound and breath and nothing else has to matter.”
“My dad always says anytime someone offers you something you have to figure out what’s in it for them. I don’t think Adam could be in it for whatever free coffee I could pass his way, so it’s exactly the kind of situation Margo would warn me about.”
This excerpt illustrates the two parenting styles that April has experienced. Her father instills in her a sense of cynicism, while Margo approaches parallel situations with a skepticism more focused on April protecting herself from harm. Margo is much more aware of the dangers men pose to women by men and wants to ensure that the motherless April recognizes those dangers as well.
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