51 pages • 1 hour read
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In her fifties, Faye Travers lives with her mother Elsie in the small New Hampshire village of Stiles and Stokes. She describes herself as “a nondescript-looking person, dark hair, dark eyes, fair skin. A face that is neither flashy nor plain. Medium build […]. There is really nothing memorable or interesting […] or certainly beautiful about me” (260). As for love, Faye admits she hasn’t “been successful at it” (59), although she has a long-term lover, Kurt Krahe, who lives down the road. He lets himself into Faye’s bedroom during the night, but during the day, they keep a polite distance from one another. Indeed, Faye keeps herself distanced from everyone, even her mother, and feels conflicted about her intimacy with Kurt, explaining, “’When Krahe touches me and I feel suddenly that I am […] beautiful, interesting, drawn in color—it is very difficult” (260).
The reasons for Faye’s lack of connection with others dates back some 40 years to the day when her sister, Netta, jumped to her death from an apple tree. Only Faye and her father witnessed the tragedy, and Faye’s father projected his responsibility for Netta’s death onto Faye, which she internalized. Her father died within a year; Faye withdrew into her guilt and grief and never spoke about the devastating events with Elsie.
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By Louise Erdrich