The Five Wishes of Mr. Murray McBride

“Can’t help but wonder now if maybe I should have spent more time telling them how much I loved them. If I had, maybe they wouldn’t have been distant parents with their own kids.”

Murray struggled to have a close relationship with his sons because he worked a lot when they were little, and his distance from them affected his grandchildren. Part of Murray’s character journey is about healing those poor parenting patterns.

“Boy his age shouldn’t have heart problems either. Why would God let me live a hundred healthy years and give that boy a bad ticker?”

Murray struggles with the injustice of Jason’s heart condition. Although he questions why God would allow a child to suffer and die, he never explicitly finds answers. The audience is left to decide what the answer is.

“Somewhere deep inside, I guess I was hoping they’d see something different. Maybe see a part of who I used to be. But it was stupid to think that could happen.”

As he has reached a remarkable old age, Murray often struggles with Accepting the Passage of Time. The world has changed dramatically since his youth, and nobody around him understands what he has been through. This isolation has made him bitter.

“I want to explain the feeling I get when I’m with Jason. The new respect for life. The feeling of being young again. I haven’t felt that way in years and Chance has probably never felt it in his life.”

Murray realizes The Importance of Human Connection when he gets to know Jason better. He wants to share his experiences with Chance, but Murray does not yet have the communication tools to make himself understood.

“I can’t help but stare at his chest and wonder how a heart so full could be so weak.”

Murray often conflates Jason’s literal heart with his metaphorical heart. It feels wrong to him that someone full of life should have their time cut short, especially when Murray himself is so bitter and at odds with life. Ironically, Murray seems almost invincible, even when all he wants is to die and be reunited with his wife.

“But they never looked at me the way they looked at Jenny. I’ve spent a lot of time and energy making sure I never acknowledge how much that hurt. Pretending it wasn’t my fault.”

Rather than take responsibility for his distant relationship with his sons, Murray shunned The Importance of Human Connection and pulled further away from fixing his mistakes. Although he could not reconcile with his sons before they died, Murray now recognizes his mistakes and is capable of change and growth.

“I just realized life’s not worth a pile of beans if you don’t live it. So I started living it.”

Despite being a curmudgeonly old man, Murray has a few words of wisdom for Jason. In this moment, the advice to live one’s life fully is not only advice for Jason but also something that Murray himself needs to remember. Together, Murray and Jason find ways to live their lives fully, even if they both know that they do not have a lot of time left.

“I’m okay. I’m pretty tough, you know? I’m not really a kid anymore.”

Jason has faced more than many 10-year-olds in his short life. The knowledge that his heart is going to give out soon ages him beyond his years. Compared to Murray, Jason is still extremely young, but he must deal with the same questions of mortality and meaning as his 100-year-old friend.

“But it’s not your day anymore, don’t you get that? Your day passed a long time ago. You’re still hanging on, and we’re all happy about that. Me, Janine, everyone. But make no mistake about it, ‘your day’, as you call it, is history. The world has changed, and you’ve been left behind.”

Chance’s words cut directly to the heart of Murray’s fears about the relentless passage of time. Murray struggles with the idea that he is being left behind, and it hurts him immensely to hear Chance confirm this fear.

“I want to do better with Chance than I did with my own boys. I want to tell him I love him and hold him tight in my arms. But that’s just not the way I’m wired, so I don’t do any more than wish on it.”

Although Murray knows what he needs to do to fix his relationship with Chance, he feels that he is too old to make the necessary change. He has not fully internalized The Importance of Human Connection, so he keeps holding back.

“‘Hello and goodbye are meaningless,’ Della says, pulling Tiegan close to her again. ‘SBK is a constant reminder, every time we greet each other, every time we say goodbye, it’s a reminder of how to live. It’s so much more than a greeting.’”

Tiegan and Della’s way of greeting each other seems strange to Murray until he learns the meaning of SBK. In this mother-daughter relationship, Murray is able to see the full potential of love and human connection to shape the lives of those around him. Tiegan and Della embody what Murray is missing in his life.

“Suddenly I wish I could stick around to see what this kid ends up doing with her life. With such a loving mother teaching her things like strength, bravery, and kindness, I bet she could do just about anything she puts her mind to.”

Just as Murray has committed to continuing his life for Jason’s sake, his interest in what Tiegan will do with her life is another reason to keep going, even if he knows he will not live long enough to see her grow up. This line takes on a cruel irony in hindsight and subtly foreshadows Tiegan’s death.

“It’s high time I do something with this life God gave me. He’s kept me here for a reason, when everyone else I know is dead and buried. I think this is it. This is why the Good Lord has let me live so long.”

Here, Murray demonstrates great Selflessness and Sacrifice. He knows that taking Jason away from his dad to help him fulfill his five wishes will get him into a lot of trouble, but the risk is worth it to him if it means he can make a difference. He didn’t previously think it was possible to create meaning in his life.

“Someone dies—someone you love, now—it’s like they take a little piece of you with them when they leave. Like you lose a little part of yourself the moment they stop breathing.”

Murray is remarkably frank with Jason when the two discuss death and grief. He understands that Jason needs to hear the truth. Murray is best equipped to talk to Jason about death because he has already been through the deaths of many of his loved ones.

“One of those times Jason mentioned the first time he told me about the game—every once in a while they just blast you for no reason, even though you didn’t do anything wrong.”

The metaphor here speaks to the sheer randomness of life. In Jason’s video game, the aliens sometimes kill the player for no reason at all. This echoes the randomness of illness or accidents, which can kill someone with little warning or reason.

“I love how he says again. Like it’s obvious we’re best friends now, and that we’ll want to be best friends again, when the time comes.”

Murray feels The Importance of Human Connection once again as Jason affirms their friendship. Murray previously thought that he had nothing to live for and no more connections to make, but Jason has finally proven him wrong.

“Who would’ve thought? The day I picked to end my life is the exact day the doctors told Jason that, without a new heart, he would be dead.”

This strange twist of fate suggests that Murray’s and Jason’s lives are intertwined. The fact that both their deaths were predicted to happen on the same day means that Murray’s decision to keep living is connected to Jason’s survival.

“The only way Jason could jump spots is if a heart becomes available locally, like if someone dies real close to him, geographically.”

The circumstances under which Jason could receive a heart transplant are dire, and with time running out, all the characters feel a new sense of urgency. The suggestion that a suitable heart might become available locally foreshadows Tiegan’s later death and her donation to save Jason’s life.

“Maybe he’s rationalized his actions, his lack of involvement in Jason’s life, by making money to pay for medical bills and figuring that was enough.”

Benedict is similar to Murray: Both prioritized making money over spending time with their children. Murray, who sees Benedict for who he is, understands that he is not making the right decisions when it comes to his son. Unlike Murray, Benedict does not learn the meaning of Selflessness and Sacrifice.

“‘That’s bullshit!’ he screams. ‘You hear me, Murray? It’s bullshit! If God’s strong enough to stop it, he should stop it! He should let me live!’”

Jason’s anguish over the unfairness of his situation raises questions of theodicy, which seeks to explain suffering, injustice, and God’s role in the lives of humans. Unlike many pieces of inspirational literature, this book does not provide a clear answer to Jason’s question. However, Jason’s demand that God prevent his death turns out to come true, as Tiegan dies in his place.

“When we still had several wishes to go, there was a lot to look forward to. But now, with four wishes down and Jason staring death in the face, how much could possibly be left? It’s like we’ve made it to the World Series. The highest point.”

Jason’s wishes keep his spirits up and give him a reason to keep going in the face of his illness. However, all goals have an endpoint, after which it is difficult to know what to do next. As with many things in his life, Murray compares this situation to baseball.

“Like Jason, the fact that you’ve been up and moving around recently is something of a medical miracle. It seems you two have been keeping each other afloat.”

Several characters remark on the way that Jason and Murray seem to be keeping each other alive. They have both beaten the odds and lived longer than anyone thought they would. The implication that this is a miracle speaks to the book’s broader religious themes and encourages the reader to think about God’s role in hardship and sickness.

“Tiegan’s sitting right next to his side, but when she sees my eyes flicker open, she comes over to me. She’s like an angel, floating from one person in need to the next. An angel in pigtails.”

This is another moment that foreshadows Tiegan’s imminent death. Murray sees her as an angel, a comparison that will soon become true when she dies, and Della donates Tiegan’s heart to Jason.