The First State of Being

Twelve-year-old Michael Rosario is the protagonist of the novel. He is a sensitive child, deeply empathetic toward others but also anxiously critical of himself. He blames himself for the loss of his mother’s job (26) and, later, Mr. Mosley’s death (177). This guilt makes him constantly anxious, putting him in a third state of being for most of the book, despite other characters’ attempts to convince him that he is not to blame. Michael’s decisions are also mainly driven by guilt and trauma—he fears being unprepared for sudden disastrous surprises (such as Ms. Rosario getting inexplicably fired) and therefore tries to prepare for every eventuality, an impossible task. His Y2K stash, meant to sustain him and his mother after the purportedly imminent Y2K disaster, is emblematic of his futile effort to protect himself and his loved ones from an unpredictable world.

Michael is racked with guilt over stealing supplies for his stash (7), as well as being unable to warn victims of the Turkey earthquake (62). Michael seeks knowledge of the future for his own peace of mind, but he struggles with the burden of that knowledge when he occasionally receives it, proving Ridge’s argument that knowledge of the future should remain secret (137-38).