The Courage to Be Disliked

As the youth enters the fifth night, he considers the meaning of life. If interpersonal relationships are all that matter, he fears that his own life is insignificant.

The man returns to the philosopher after a month and asks how to shift from thinking about the self to thinking about others—in his case, from self-loathing to concern for others. He explains that he is self-conscious and cannot feel free. The philosopher introduces the idea of happiness for their conversation of the day.

The philosopher clarifies that being self-conscious is an interpersonal issue, because when the young man is alone, only then can he be himself. The philosopher introduces concepts of self-acceptance, confidence in others, and contribution to others. He explains that self-acceptance as opposed to self-affirmation encourages one to see oneself as they are, including the things they cannot change, whether good or bad. Then, they can gain the courage to change the things that it is possible to change. The man quotes Kurt Vonnegut, who wrote a similar adage in his novel Slaughterhouse-Five.