The Courage to Be Disliked

The youth arrives confident that he is right to choose not to be free if freedom means suffering loneliness and being disliked.

The young man argues that Adlerian psychology encourages isolation. However, the philosopher explains that Adlerian psychology simply encourages people to untangle the threads that connect them to others. Holism is the idea that a person is one whole, not individual parts. The philosopher states that today, he’d like to explore the kinds of relationships that people should form with others.

The philosopher says that the point of interpersonal relationships is to develop “community feeling,” a concept that Adler defines as the feeling of having a place of refuge with one’s comrades. Adler includes past and present, objects, plants, and animals in the sense of community as well. The young man is confused, so the philosopher breaks the idea down into the smallest social unit: you and me. The starting point for community feeling is a shift from self-interest to concern for others, or social interest.