Thank You for Smoking

Nick meets the Mod Squad for lunch and sees them reading Heather’s Moon article, which refers to Nick as a “Thoroughly Modern Merchant of Death” (93). Following their lunch, Nick goes to see Dr. Wheat, an osteopath who helps him when he feels overcome with stress. After manipulating Nick’s head, neck, and back, the doctor administers a Novocain injection and tells Nick not to drive.

Despite the doctor’s warning, Nick speeds in his BMW to St. Euthanasia to keep his appointment with Reverand Griggs, intentionally trying to leave his bodyguards behind. In the headmaster’s office, Nick learns that the school, suffering financially, wants a donation from the Academy. Asking if he can light up a cigarette, he puts Griggs in the position of finding him a nonexistent ashtray. He promises that the Academy will donate to the school through one of its ancillary organizations, the Coalition for Health.

Leaving the school, Nick loses his bodyguards, who are following him in another car. He receives a call from Jeannette and says he will be at the office in 10 minutes. He offers to buy her a cappuccino. As he waits for his cappuccinos in the building’s atrium, a large unhoused man approaches and asks for a quarter.