Survivor Type

“Can you imagine that bird, almost breaking my ankle and then pecking me? If I catch another one tomorrow, I’ll torture it. I let this one off too easily. Even as I write, I am able to glance down at its severed head on the sand. Its black eyes, even with the death-glaze on them, seem to be mocking me.”

The excerpt starts with an apostrophe, in which Pine is addressing the invisible presence he has been conversing with, which helps immerse the reader into the narrative. This excerpt marks the moment when the narrative becomes macabre, as the main character is experiencing both delight and frustration toward the bird he killed. Additionally, this passage is at the end of one of Pine’s daily entries, which gives the gruesome scene of the tone a certain finality.

“I was one hell of a surgeon, as I believe I may have said. They drummed me out. It’s a laugh, really: they all do it, and they’re so bloody sanctimonious when someone gets caught at it. Screw you, Jack, I got mine. The Second Oath of Hippocrates and Hypocrites.”

This excerpt demonstrates the complexity of the main character. Even though he has a background in medicine and academia, as is highlighted by his use of the word “sanctimonious” and his reference to the Oath of Hippocrates, Pine uses slang words to describe how he lost his position because he participated in the drug trade. This excerpt also serves as commentary about the narrator’s perception of the healthcare system as corrupt and duplicitous.

“I had a deal going with half a dozen East Side pharmacists, with two drug supply houses, and with at least twenty other doctors. Patients were sent to me and I sent patients. I performed operations and prescribed the correct post-op drugs. Not all the operations were necessary, but I never performed one against a patient’s will.”

Pine continues to expose the corruption within the healthcare industry, claiming that numerous medical professionals were involved in the illicit drug industry. However, this passage also sheds light on the ambiguous nature of the character. Despite being involved in illegal activities, he maintains that he never coerced any of his patients. Thus, while admitting to moral wrongdoings, the character tries to exonerate himself in the face of the possible impending death.

“Killed another gull, the same way I did the first. I was too hungry to torture it the way I had been promising myself. I gutted and ate it. Squeezed the tripes and then ate them, too.”

The excerpt provides carnal details about Pine’s consumption of the bird, which he divides into different parts, foreshadowing how he will be forced to fragment himself to prolong his life. The passage is one of the numerous examples of the use of parataxis, and the brevity, as well as the lack of coordination of the sentences, reflect Pine’s animal-like nature emerging.

“My foot throbs constantly. There is swelling still and ominous discoloration around the double break. Discoloration seems to have advanced. Binding it tightly with my shirt alleviates the worst of the pain, but it’s still bad enough so that I faint rather than sleep.”

This part of Pine’s entry contrasts with some of the previous passages, in which Pine used commonplace colloquialisms. In this passage, he employs sophisticated vocabulary and medical jargon, which demonstrates his background as a surgeon, as he is able to diagnose himself as he would a patient.

“Topside, everything was confusion. I saw a screeching woman with a baby in her arms run past me, gaining speed as she sprinted down the slippery, canting deck. She hit the rail with her thighs, and flipped outward. I saw her do two midair somersaults and part of a third before I lost sight of her.”

This passage gives insight into Pine’s character, as he is calmly recounting the suffering and the panic he witnessed during the sinking of the cruise ship. He is reflecting on the horrors of people falling overboard and burning to death with absolute calmness. His matter-of-fact tone indicates that he experiences little sympathy for people around him and that he is solely preoccupied with his safety.

“Hot pretzels baked salmon baked Alaska baked ham with pineapple tings. Onion rings. Onion dip with potato chips cold iced tea in long long sips french fries make you smack your lips. 100, 99, 98, 97, 96, 95, 94 God God God.”

The excerpt is an example of parataxis, as the author uses uncoordinated sentences to convey how scattered Pine’s thoughts are. The pain and the itch of the stump left after the first amputation, combined with heroin use and the shock of having eaten his own flesh, have impacted his mental health. The narration becomes increasingly fragmented and filled with mistakes, marking the approaching peak of the character’s delirium.

“I just managed to get back to the beach, shaking with exhaustion, racked with pain, weeping and screaming, cursing the gull. It floated there for a long time, always further and further out. I seem to remember begging it to come back at one point. But when it went out over the reef, I think it was dead.”

The detailed vivid description of Pine’s efforts to capture a seagull adds a dimension of realism to the passage. Additionally, the passage demonstrates how Pine is becoming an increasingly unreliable narrator, who cannot even say with certainty whether he was imploring the bird to return or not.

“I’ve amputated my left foot and have bandaged it with my pants. Strange. All through the operation I was drooling. Drooooling. Just like when I saw the gull. Drooling helplessly.”

The passage is one of the numerous examples of parataxis that the author uses to convey how autocannibalism, starvation, and drug use have rendered Pine’s thoughts disarrayed. The repetition of the word “drooling” draws the reader’s attention to it, emphasizing Pine’s intense hunger. Moreover, highlighting bodily functions adds a dimension of realism, which immerses the reader in the storyline.

“Then… I kept telling myself: Cold roast beef. Cold roast beef. Cold roast beef.”

In this passage, the author uses parataxis to intentionally omit exactly what Pine is comparing to cold roast beef, encouraging the audience to come to the conclusion themselves. Thus, he is inviting them to imagine the chilling figure of a man consuming his own body parts. Pine repeats the words “cold roast beef” in an attempt to make his meal seem more appealing, but the phrase has the opposite appalling effect on the reader.

“A gull landed on the tip of the rockpile today. Flew away before I could get in range. I wished it into hell, where it could peck out Father Hailley’s bloodshot little eyes through eternity.”

This passage follows Pine’s exhausting reconstruction of the letter “HELP” on the island, an activity that leaves him feeling completely drained. These lines communicate Pine’s recurring anger induced by his suffering, a feeling he projects onto a seagull and a priest he met as a youth. Pine appears to bemoan not only his current condition but his past as well.

“Hands trembling. If they are betraying me, I’m through. They have no right to betray me. No right at all. I’ve taken care of them all their lives. Pampered them. They better not. Or they’ll be sorry.”

This passage demonstrates that Pine’s end is approaching. Instead of externalizing his anger at the seagulls, he is now frustrated with his hands for not being reliable enough. The threat at the end of the quote foreshadows the possibility that he will consume his hands, similarly to the way he consumes other body parts, which would render him completely incapacitated.

“I remember Dom used to say that. Waltz up to you on the street comer in his Hiway Outlaws club jacket. You’d say Dom how’d you make out with her’? And Dom would say no way no how. Shee. Old Dom. I wish I’d stayed right in the neighborhood. This sucks so bad as Dom would say. Haha.”

After having amputated his left leg at the knee, Pine is completely succumbing to the dire physical and psychological conditions. He appears to be reminiscing about his past, but his writing has become so fragmented that it is no longer comprehensible.