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At the beginning of the narrative, Blade never questions his identity. Feeling secure in his place within his family, he instead expresses his frustrations with his father and describes himself as “the wretched son / of a poor / rich man” (18), but while his father drives him crazy, Blade never doubts the validity of his relationships. Blade’s memories of his mom are of pure love, and he clings to this love, even when the family secret is revealed. Blade’s description of his dream illustrates how after learning about his adoption, he feels as though his world has tilted and feels “like a thousand puzzle pieces / that just don’t fit / together anymore” (8). Blade feels as though his identity has been ripped away from him: “What is this blood / coursing through my veins? // It’s not Morrison. / It’s a red river / of who the hell am I” (154). The pain is amplified with the assumption that he was given up for adoption due to his biological parents’ lack of love for him. As much as Blade despised Hollywood, he belonged. Now, when he passes the palm trees, he’s struck by their foreign origins and feels akin to the way the trees were transplanted by Spaniards, as he too feels transplanted.
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