42 pages • 1 hour read
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Content Warning: This section of the guide includes discussion of bullying.
Alex believes that the worst part of Little League is at the beginning of every season when he is required to yell out his uniform size in front of everyone. Alex has always been the smallest kid on the team, but this year, he notices that he’ll be the only one wearing a small-sized uniform.
Alex recalls a time in kindergarten when his teacher told the class to cut out magazine pictures representing their image of themselves as adults. When Alex brought in a picture of the Lucky Charms leprechaun, his teacher was concerned. Alex joked with her at first and then confessed that he would rather be a pilot, but the assignment was about what they were going to be, not what they wanted to be. Alex’s teacher called his mom, who sat him down and talked to him about his small size. She emphasized that everyone grows at different rates and then measured his height on the doorframe and made a mark to prove that he was growing. Six months later, she measured him again, and he had grown by half an inch. Alex joked about all the rest of the growing he’d still need to do to be a “real boy,” and his comment frustrated his mom. Alex felt like she just didn’t understand.
Now, when Alex’s coach calls his name, demanding to know his uniform size, Alex shouts, “Large!” He’s decided that he can’t handle another year of shouting that he needs a size small. The coach is skeptical and makes Alex repeat himself. Alex is so excited about the large uniform that he dreams of uniform day. In his dream, he is the only large on his team, and everyone cheers for how large he is.
However, on uniform day, the team lines up with instructions to retrieve their uniforms from the appropriate pile. Alex runs to the large pile and takes a uniform. He even waits near the pile for the rest of the team to finish so that everyone can see that he has a large uniform. Once everyone has their uniforms, a large guy, Randy, struggles to get his on. Randy claimed the only small uniform because it was all that was left. The coach forces Alex to trade with Randy. Alex realizes that the coach put him down for a small uniform all along, aware that he was lying. Alex feels embarrassed that he has to wear the smallest uniform. When he tries his unform on at home, the neck has been stretched out by Randy’s large head. Alex’s mom assures him that the uniform will shrink in the wash. Then, Alex’s pants fall down.
Alex is tired of hearing T.J. brag about his Little League team, which hasn’t lost a game all season. Alex thinks that there’s no way that the team is winning just because of T.J., just like there’s no way Alex’s team is always losing because of Alex—or so he hopes. Alex reassures himself that he is not the worst player on the team because there’s a player sitting out with a broken arm. Alex plays right field and disagrees with the idea that the bad players are outfielders.
Alex tries to ignore T.J.’s incessant bragging, but he eventually gets fed up and begins boasting to his friend Brian about his own curve ball in earshot of T.J. T.J. proposes a pitching contest after school, and although Alex tries to joke his way out of it with silly excuses, T.J. becomes more aggressive and emphasizes that it’s not a suggestion but a demand. He threatens Alex if he doesn’t show up. Brian is still laughing at Alex’s jokes when T.J. leaves. Alex jokes again about his curve ball, and they both laugh.
Alex tries to delay going to the pitch-off with T.J. He bothers Mrs. Grayson after school, offering to clean her classroom or attend her teacher’s meeting with her. Mrs. Grayson is suspicious about Alex’s unwillingness to leave school, but he assures her that he will be fine and eventually leaves after she yells at him.
Many of the kids from school are gathered at the Little League field to witness the contest. Alex and T.J. each have their own umpire so that the contest will be judged fairly. T.J. brings one of his friends, and Alex brings Brian. Alex continues to boast about his curve ball while doing everything he can to stall the pitch-off through jokes and challenges of fairness. Alex tries to convince Brian to help him cheat by calling T.J.’s pitches balls instead of strikes, but T.J. has already threatened Brian into honesty.
T.J. throws 10 perfect strikes right over the base. Then, Alex walks in slow motion to take his place on the mound, hoping that sudden catastrophic weather will cancel the contest. He realizes that it’s a long way to home plate and that he’ll be lucky to throw a ball that far. T.J. mocks Alex from the stands, calling him “skinnybones.” Alex uses the mocking as an excuse to stall even longer, approaching T.J. and demanding that he stop name-calling.
Back on the mound, Alex struggles to remember exactly how to wind up for his pitch. He stumbles around, stalling further by making the crowd laugh. When he throws his first pitch, it hits the ground but eventually rolls over home base, which makes Alex proud because he didn’t expect to do that well. Alex tries to call it there, as he can’t beat T.J.’s perfect score after messing up his first pitch, but T.J. forces Alex to stay and compete.
Alex is so nervous that his second pitch slips out of his hand during the wind-up. By this point, he is sick with embarrassment and just wants to leave. Alex’s third pitch hits T.J. squarely in the head, and Alex jokes that it’s a strike because it struck T.J. T.J. is not amused, and he punches Alex in the arm over and over, as hard as he can, in the same spot. As a result, Alex can’t use his arm, and it’s clear that the contest is over. The victorious T.J. walks off with his friends while Alex walks home alone, as Brian has abandoned him.
This section of the novel delves further into Alex’s insecurities and his habit of Using Humor to Cope With Conflict, and he learns the hard lesson that The Consequences of Lying are often more onerous than simply telling the truth to begin with. Park delivers a series of whimsical incidents to illustrate this concept, suggesting that lying is less than advantageous no matter what the circumstance happens to be. In Chapter 4, for example, Alex uses a disastrous combination of humor and dishonesty to cope with his insecurity about his size. This starts with a flashback to kindergarten when instead of presenting what he wanted to be when he grew up, Alex presented a picture of the Lucky Charms leprechaun to joke about his dismal certainty that he would be small, even as an adult. Despite this attempt at humor, Alex found himself enduring lectures from both his teacher and his mom, and it is clear that his self-deprecating jokes backfired entirely.
Similar troubles arise when Alex lies about the size of his baseball uniform, as rather than concealing his insecurities about his size, his lie ultimately shines a metaphorical spotlight on his small stature when he is forced to publicly claim the only small uniform that the coach ordered. The long-term social ramifications of Alex’s lie prove to be far more embarrassing than simply admitting the truth, and he ends up charging head-on into the very conflict that he was trying to avoid.
However, these minor run-ins pale in comparison to Alex’s rash reaction to T.J.’s boasting, as Alex lies himself right into a very public pitching showdown with his greatest schoolyard nemesis, taking on a challenge that is doomed to failure from the very beginning. When he is forced to showcase his own non-existent curveball in comparison with T.J.’s superior pitching prowess, Park deliberately lingers on the humiliating episode as Alex tries every trick he has to delay the contest or get out of it completely. Thus, as he scrambles to avoid the consequences of lying, he makes his problems worse by using humor to cope with conflict and relying on ineffectual displays of slapstick comedy to solve his problems.
Throughout these school-themed conflicts, T.J. repeatedly functions as Alex’s antagonist and also his foil. Alex has always been able to charm people with his comedy, as seen in Chapter 1 when he makes his mom laugh in order to get out of trouble. However, T.J. is the one person who remains unmoved by Alex’s jokes. This makes T.J. Alex’s greatest challenger, as none of Alex’s usual tricks and charms work on him. T.J.’s mere physical presence also highlights all of Alex’s perceived inadequacies, and he knows how to pick at Alex’s insecurities, even going so far as to create the titular nickname, “skinnybones.” As T.J. easily bests Alex in the pitching contest, the incident reveals to everyone that Alex did not tell the truth about his own pitching skills. Alex’s resulting humiliation conveys the idea that lying to avoid consequences can lead to even greater consequences.
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