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“And this, of course, was the essence of my fury: that such couples would never exist with the genders switched, that a gorgeous male celebrity would never fall in love with an ordinary, dorky, unkempt woman. Never. No matter how clever she was.”
At the start of the novel, Sittenfeld establishes a sexist double standard that catalyzes an internal and external conflict for her protagonist. Sally is enraged that funny but otherwise mediocre men can date superstars, whereas women can never be their dorky and average selves and still be seen as desirable. When Sally meets Noah, the distrust and aversion she feels for the impossible standards set for women by celebrity culture initially get in the way of a potential romantic connection between them.
“Their sincerity and spontaneity and sheer optimism all seemed so misguided, so destined to fail, that how could anyone, including a cynic like me, not root for them?”
This quote establishes Sally’s disillusionment with love. Love that is optimistic, sincere, and spontaneous seems “destined to fail” in Sally’s eyes. As the novel opens, Sally is not a romantic, and she doesn’t appreciate overly demonstrative romance in others—a coping mechanism rooted in Sally’s own internal difficulty giving and receiving love. Sally’s proximity to high-profile celebrity relationships on TNO highlights a distinction between larger-than-life romance in the public eye and private love between average people. To Sally, Annabel and Danny’s love seems “misguided” because Annabel capitalizes on it to gain attention and publicity on her social media platforms, which Sally feels makes their relationship performative instead of authentic.
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By Curtis Sittenfeld