45 pages • 1 hour read
“Is it autobiography if parts of it are not true? Is it fiction if parts of it are?”
Barry introduces one of the themes of the book: the definition of memoir as a genre. Asking a series of questions that she will explore in the book, she invites the reader to consider these definitions with her. She also sets the reader up to understand the style of the book—it mixes imaginative fiction with investigations into Barry’s real life in pursuit of a deeper emotional truth.
“She was at the library when she first read about a painting exercise called, ‘one hundred demons’!”
Barry explains the central conceit of the book, the Zen meditative exercise that prompts each chapter’s visual essay about a different “demon”—or a person, idea, or experience that haunts Barry or challenges some aspect of her life and growth. By flipping the narrator into the third person (Barry refers to herself as “she”), Barry constructs herself as a separate entity, mimicking the way she will analyze the different versions of herself with reflective distance.
“He seemed interested in my background and nick-named me ‘little ghetto girl.’”
This quote describes Barry’s worst boyfriend and his class-inflected condescension toward her. He both fetishizes her underprivileged upbringing and denigrates it, using a derogatory term and equating her with a child. These kinds of comments create a toxic power dynamic, where the boyfriend feels that Barry should be grateful for his interest in her and constantly uses his upper hand to make her feel insecure.
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