50 pages • 1 hour read
Lillian Breaker is the story’s 28-year-old narrator and protagonist. Lillian avoids describing her own physical characteristics, only once mentioning that she is and has always been “soft” (97). She also mentions that she failed to inherit the good looks of her mother’s youth. This indicates that Lillian does not see value in her own attributes and reflects one of Lillian’s central characteristics—her extremely low self-esteem. Lillian has a difficult relationship with her mother, a woman who is never named. This is a deliberate act and shows that Lillian is disinclined to grant her mother a position of importance in her story; her mother has been a source of persistent condescension. Madison is one of few people who ever show Lillian genuine kindness. Their relationship reflects many of the complicated realities of female friendships, but it also carries an undercurrent of something more: Lillian loves Madison, wants to kiss her, and wants to be with her (the novel does not explicitly address or label Lillian’s queerness, but it is present not only in her interactions with Madison but also in her repulsion at the thought of romance with men). This love, which is originally unrequited, causes Lillian to tolerate behavior from Madison no unbiased person would accept.
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