18 pages • 36 minutes read
My Uncle’s Favorite Coffee Shop
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Themes
The Immigrant Experience
“My Uncle’s Favorite Coffee Shop” focuses on the experience of a man, likely from Palestine, who immigrated to the United States where he lives for 23 years before returning home. Nye uses the uncle figure to examine the immigrant experience in the United States, showing the small difficulties and pleasures often unnoticed by the rest of the culture. She begins with the notion of belonging, expressing the comfort her uncle feels in being “known personally” (Line 2) by the barista at the coffeeshop. Nye focuses on a specific, small occurrence: “What pleasure for an immigrant— / anything without saying” (Lines 6-7), asking the reader to consider a daily interaction—like purchasing breakfast—from the perspective of a non-native speaker. In these lines, Nye conveys the anxiety and relief of being in a country where the spoken language is not one’s first, and the sense of relief at not having to speak it in a small, everyday scenario.
Although the ritual of frequenting this shop provides the uncle with a sense of comfort and belonging, Nye notes later in the poem that “he never became them” (Line 27), referencing the other patrons of the shop. She writes, “[i]mmigrants had double and nothing all at once. / Immigrants drove the taxis, sold the beer and Cokes” (Lines 21-22). The uncle has the rich influence of both cultures at once, but Nye acknowledges that in America, this dual immigrant experience generally goes without acknowledgment or respect. She points out that immigrants often do the foundational labor of the country—driving taxis and selling things like beer and soda—proving the backbone of the economy. Despite this and even after 23 years, the uncle never fully feels a sense of belonging and is excited to return to his homeland.
Intimacy and Belonging
In “My Uncle’s Favorite Coffee Shop,” Nye suggests that one of the ways in which America has failed its immigrant population has been its inability to offer a sense of intimacy and belonging to the dominant culture. In the first stanza, she writes of the “comfort to be known personally by Barbara, / her perfect pouring hand and starched ascot, / known as the two easy eggs and the single pancake, / without saying” (Lines 2-5). While the uncle’s solace at being known in this way is genuine, the interaction is still transaction-based and lacks any true intimacy. While he feels comfortable with his breakfast ritual at this coffee shop, he never achieves a sense of belonging, even after 23 years. Nye writes: “His eyes roamed the couples at other booths, / their loose banter and casual clothes. / But he never became them” (Lines 25-27). The uncle keenly watches the other shop patrons, suggesting he desires to be like them, he envies the ease with which they speak and dress, or that he is observing them to mimic their ways and better assimilate into American culture. Nye indicates that the uncle has always attempted communication and intimacy; the speaker says the uncle would say “I cannot tell you—all the time. But then he’d try” (Line 13). She communicates his determination and his investment in the habits and rituals that come with life in his new country, while still longing for the old. This duality leads him to have “double and nothing all at once” (Line 20), never having the full experience of belonging in his adopted country.
Nye follows the claim that “he never became them” (Line 27) with the uncle’s desire to return home, “to live in the old country forever, / to stay and never come back” (Lines 29-30). The urgency and finality of his language underscore how America failed to truly embrace or welcome him, and how his experience has not proved satisfying. Even after 23 years, he prefers to chance his more turbulent home country than remain in the States—a decision with fatal consequences.
Spoken Language and Communication
Much of “My Uncle’s Favorite Coffee Shop” reiterates the power of spoken language to make a person feel a sense of belonging or intimacy. Nye begins by describing the comfort of a barista knowing the uncle’s regular order by heart: “What pleasure for an immigrant— / anything without saying” (Lines 6-7). She sets up an unacknowledged difference between non-native and native speakers of a particular country, asking her reader to consider the experience of someone living in a country where they must learn and speak a new language, and are therefore often at a disadvantage because they do not have the same grasp of spoken communication nuance.
In the case of the uncle, Nye suggests that despite his best efforts to always try and seek the “one note that rang true” (Line 22) in language, he still felt distant from the others in the coffee shop. These others have “loose banter” (Line 26)—a kind of informality that allows them to communicate with ease and participate in the culture in ways he cannot.
While the uncle feels he “cannot tell [the speaker]” something at multiple points in the poem, the speaker complicates this claim, allowing the reader to see the uncle’s rich life, and his ability to communicate complex emotion despite feeling unmoored in the language. His “bravado moment” (Line 28) of leaving after 23 years, “to live in the old country forever, / to stay and never come back” (Lines 29-30), and his expression that “my heart has settled at last” are moving, emotionally deep, and resonant lines that characterize his experience of longing and create an emotional connection between both the speaker and the reader of the poem.
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By Naomi Shihab Nye
