My Family Divided: One Girl's Journey of Home, Loss, and Hope

The day that Diane’s parents were detained began like any other. Diane was 14 years old and attending Boston Arts Academy, where she excelled in singing. Things had been looking up for her family, as her Papi had recently won a small lottery, and the family felt closer together. That morning, her Mami urged her to eat, but she was in too much of a rush to get to school and left without saying goodbye. All day, Diane felt off and slightly ill, feeling regretful for leaving her mother this way. When she got out of class, however, she went to spend some money from her Papi’s winnings on some new shoes and felt great. Afterward, she called her parents to tell them she was on her way home, but nobody answered the phone. Diane dashed home, afraid her parents had been “taken.” When she saw her Papi’s car in the driveway, she thought it was a good sign.

Diane was born in the summer of 1986 with citizenship in the US—a status that her parents and older brother Eric did not have. Diane’s parents both worked multiple jobs, taking whatever work they could find. They always tried to be home for supper, which was important family time. When Diane’s parents were at work, Eric would look after her, as he was 10 years older than his sister. Diane’s parents were both excellent cooks and always ensured there was food in the fridge, though the family lived with little financial means. Diane’s parents took pride in their appearance and passed this value onto their children. The neighborhood was filled with other immigrants, and they formed a community that relied on each other and regularly celebrated together. The family would often house new immigrants in their apartment while they got settled. Diane met her best friends, Dana, Gabriela, and Sabrina, when she was a young child. She recalls the simple experiences of childhood when she spent hours playing with her friends. Guerrero writes that these memories keep her grounded through difficult times. The chapter ends with a photograph of Diane’s parents looking “real ‘70s.”

Diane provides some family details. Her parents never wanted to leave Colombia. They both loved their country and hometown despite hardships and having to work from a young age. Both of Diane’s parents experienced personal loss. Eric’s father was abusive to Diane’s Mami before Diane’s parents met and started a life together. After the deaths of several family members, Diane’s mother wanted to join her sister in the US for a new life and to raise Eric in a place that she considered to be filled with opportunity. Diane’s Papi had been more reluctant, particularly because the plan was to get a 90-day visa and then stay as undocumented immigrants in the hope of not being discovered. Once in the US, the family made efforts to gain citizenship but had not been successful.

Diane recalls how Eric and her Papi would argue often, as it was clear that Eric felt out of place and like his future was without hope. Being undocumented meant Eric could not do the things that he wanted to, making him rebellious. Diane’s parents would often argue over Eric and his mental health and behavior. Once, when Diane was seven, she threatened to call the police if they didn’t stop. Her Mami warned her that doing so would mean she would lose her family, and Diane realized that everything she loved could easily be taken away.

Diane’s family life was defined by their quest for citizenship, and Diane learned at a young age never to tell anyone that her parents and brother were undocumented. When the Immigration Reform and Control Act was passed in 1986, Diane’s mother was filled with hope that they could finally gain legal status through a government pardon. Her father, on the other hand, was skeptical and worried that revealing themselves would result in deportation. He was recommended a lawyer who said he helped immigrants gain citizenship. The man charged a $500 initial fee and told Diane’s Papi it could take up to 10 years.

Diane’s school life was a mixed experience. She loved elementary school but found middle school more difficult as the school was affected by gang- and drug-related issues. It was also common for girls at the school to become pregnant at a young age, affecting their lives and opportunities. At 12, Diane applied to a leadership role to provide sex education to her peers. She also found a passion for music through jazz. She noticed that there were very few Latina actors or singers in the media and wondered if she had any hope of achieving success. Diane and her friends were often bullied for having a Colombian background, even within the Latin community. Guerrero notes that racism can exist within racial groupings, just as it exists between them. Diane was average academically; her school was not excellent and her parents could not afford tutors or any other help. Similarly, Eric’s mental health declined as the family could not afford to seek help. Eric had a child with his girlfriend, Gloria, and although they married, their marriage soon fell apart. The relationship breakup left him more unhappy than ever.