Mistakes We Never Made

Nine years before Sybil’s wedding, Emma attends a pool party at Katie Dalton’s house the summer after her first year of college. Sybil picks her up for the party, and Emma feels like they aren’t as close as they used to be prior to their senior year of high school.

When they arrive at the party, Sybil asks Emma to go in and check if her ex-boyfriend, Liam, is at the party. Liam proposed to her when they were in high school, and Sybil doesn’t want to see him. Shocked by this information, Emma goes in but doesn’t see him. Then, she and Sybil re-enter the party together, and Emma watches as Sybil manages to capture everyone’s attention, a phenomenon Emma calls the “Sybil Effect” (96).

Emma runs into Finn, whose father passed away during the past year. He asks how college is for her and whether she has a boyfriend. She replies that she’s not really dating, and he says that he isn’t either. Emma spots Sybil losing at beer pong and comments that she’ll be hungover on the plane the next day; they’re leaving for their trip across Europe. Knowing that she doesn’t like planes, he asks if she’s nervous and recommends the “three-three-three rule” as a method of combatting anxiety (101). The method involves naming three items she can see, three she can hear, and three she can touch.

Later, in the pool, Emma asks about Finn’s black eye, and he comments that he’s not been making good decisions. He compliments her and then apologizes for what happened when they were juniors. He asks if he can kiss her, and Emma agrees, so he does. When he starts to take off her bikini, she asks what their actions mean. He wonders if they have to mean anything, and Emma moves away from him. She wants it to mean something. Finn apologizes, saying again that he hasn’t made good choices. When he offers to drive her home, Emma begrudgingly agrees.

In the car on the way to Las Vegas, two days before Sybil’s wedding, Emma feels like she and Finn are their old selves on the way to a debate team tournament. She knows that once they get to Las Vegas and find Sybil, they’ll return to being near strangers.

Trying to defuse any romantic tension between them, Emma insults the green juice he is drinking. They return to their game of naming actors from movies and discuss what constitutes a “cinematic masterpiece” (113). Finn says that a masterpiece is something that brings joy even years later. Emma thinks he might be talking about something more than movies, but then Finn slams on his brakes. Emma spills her coffee all over herself, and Finn pulls over. He explains that he was swerving to avoid a fox. When he pulls back onto the highway, she removes her shirt to pat at the coffee. He slams on his brakes again, clearly shocked to see her without a shirt. He gives her an old sweatshirt from the backseat.

Emma pulls out the Celtic Woman CD she finds in the car door, and Finn explains that it’s from the last vacation his family took with his dad before he passed away. They always tried to have music, movies, and books set in the places they were planning to travel to. Emma says that her mom never took her and her sister on big trips and that they usually weren’t organized. Finn says that’s probably why she’s so organized, because she kept her family on time. Emma is struck by how true this is.

Soon after, Emma falls asleep. She dreams of her mom asking her to help with a school project for her sister while she tries to find Sybil. Then, she dreams of getting a massage from Finn and startles herself awake when she moans. She knows Finn heard her.

Finn and Emma stop to use the restroom and stumble upon a place called the “Intergalactic Emporium” (123). They go inside and find that it is decorated to look like an airlock. It warns them that they’re about to experience decontamination, and Finn takes her hand. Then, a blast of air conditioning comes on before the next set of doors opens. The emporium is a space-themed giftshop. Emma and Finn walk around, still holding hands. They get a sparkly headband for Sybil, and Emma picks out a hot sauce for herself.

Emma’s sister Liz calls, revealing that Emma’s confrontation with Aaron is trending on social media. Liz also asks about the man near her in the video, and Emma explains that she knows Finn from high school. Liz says that her friend slept with him a few months prior after they met on a dating app. He had said he wasn’t into serious relationships at that time.

Liz asks for Emma’s suggestion on what to wear to a networking event. She’s staying at Emma’s place in New York, and Emma has been helping her find an internship.

Finn and Emma get back on the road. Emma looks at Sybil’s location again, and she’s still in Las Vegas. Emma thinks about how she needs to help Sybil because Sybil has always made her feel included, especially when she missed her dad when they were younger.

They arrive in Las Vegas.

Finn turns his car over to the valet at Caesar’s Palace, and they go inside. Emma worries that Sybil doesn’t actually want to be found. When they walk by the reproduction of the Trevi Fountain at Caesar’s Palace, Finn suggests that they make a wish, something that’s just for each of them. He makes his and throws his coin in the water. Emma silently wishes someone would take care of her.

Thinking that Sybil must be staying at this hotel, they go to the casino floor to wait for her. Finn suggests that they play roulette. A woman mistakes them for an engaged couple, and Finn encourages her. Finn whispers that they should up their bet. If she wins, she gets to drive and keep his sweatshirt. If he wins, she says something nice, and he suggests that he has some idea of what he wants her to say. Aroused, Emma also trusts him to not ask for something outside of her comfort zone.

Emma relays that they used to have a small roulette table in their apartment. She shows him a picture, and they stand close together in the crowded room. The dealer interrupts them to say that Emma won the game of roulette, and the woman who thought they were a couple suggests that they kiss to celebrate. Everyone at the roulette table chants, but Finn says they shouldn’t kiss there, suggestively slipping his hand beneath her sweatshirt. The dealer also reveals that the hotel wants to give them complimentary tickets to the boxing fight.

Emma’s phone rings, and it’s Nikki. She says that Jamie is on his way to Las Vegas.

Nikki explains to Emma how she has lied to Jamie, telling him that Sybil is in Vegas to have the bachelorette party she didn’t previously get to have. One of Jamie’s friends has a private jet and is letting him and several other members of the wedding party, including Nikki, borrow it to join in the fun. Their flight leaves in an hour, and so it’ll be just under two hours before Jamie arrives at the casino.

Emma thinks that she and Finn have good chemistry as a team as they go off to find Sybil. He then suggests that they post a picture of themselves in Vegas to see if it will bring her to them. He also insists that she needs to eat and leads them toward the Bellagio. She appreciates that he’s taking charge. He adds that he’s owed her a nice dinner since high school.

When they get to the restaurant, there’s a dress code, and so Finn says that he’s going to get a room and grab a dinner jacket from the car. He tells her to find an outfit and then go to their room so she can shower. They’ll meet back in an hour.

Emma buys a jade dress and goes back to the hotel. She feels like she’s finally going on a date with Finn, and she is pleased with the way she looks in the dress. She wonders if she should’ve let herself be vulnerable with Finn and see where their relationship could go. She wishes Sybil was there to wish her luck.

It’s five years before Sybil’s wedding, and Emma has been living in New York City for just over a year. Emma feels like she has a handle on living in the Big Apple, but Sybil still seems aloof.

Sybil arrives home one day and asks Emma if Finn can stay at their apartment. Reluctantly, Emma agrees. It turns out that he’s coming the next day; Sybil had avoided telling her because she thought Emma would panic. Emma’s boyfriend is out of town, so they plan on Finn sleeping on the couch. Sybil reveals that he’s been dating a girl in San Francisco. Emma is dating a guy who she thinks sometimes acts like she’s not smart enough for him.

The next day, Finn is there when Emma gets home from work. It has been four years since she last saw him. He, Emma, and Sybil get dinner together, and Emma tries to ignore her attraction to Finn. While they get drinks, Emma notices Sybil on her phone. Sybil tells her that the man she’s been hooking up with, Sebastian, is in town briefly before he has to leave again for work. Knowing that Sybil doesn’t get to see him very often, Emma tells her to go.

Emma feels slightly awkward alone with Finn. She asks about the logo on his vest, and he tells her it’s for his startup. Then, he asks about their rooftop, and they leave so Emma can show it to him.

When they get there, Emma warns him not to let the door close, or they’ll be stuck on the roof all night. He asks about her boyfriend, and Emma says that he rows crew and is very smart and attractive. Then, Emma asks about his girlfriend, to which he responds that she asked him about being in an open relationship. When Emma asks if that’s what he wants, he replies that the person who wants more freedom in a relationship controls it.

Emma says she couldn’t be in an open relationship, and Finn admits that he’s not sure he can either. He comments that he can see how invested she gets in people. They talk about how flaky Sebastian is, and Emma says that it’s important to be able to depend on people. Then, she realizes that it seems like she’s implying something about Finn. He says that he was at the hospital the night of the junior prom because it was the day his father learned his cancer was terminal. He forgot about prom until he got home and called her as soon as he did. Emma apologizes for not trusting that he had a good reason, and he apologizes for not being more honest. Then, she brings up that Sybil saw him at the mall, but he reveals that Sybil was at the hospital too. However, it isn’t his place to tell her why. Emma feels like her understanding of the past, Finn, and herself is completely warped.

They draw closer, and Finn asks to kiss her. She says yes. When Emma goes to take off Finn’s pants, he stops, realizing that she has a boyfriend. Emma immediately feels awful, knowing that it wasn’t just a one-night mistake. She has feelings for Finn. He hugs her and tells her that they’ll work through this.

Later, he kisses her goodnight, then texts her from the living room. He says that maybe it’s best that he and his girlfriend go their separate ways since she doesn’t want to be with just him, especially when he knows someone does. Emma feels like it will work out between them. She knew that she shouldn’t be with her boyfriend.