Lost in the Sun

Lost in the Sun by middle grade author Lisa Graff follows the story of Trent Zimmerman, who feels responsible for the accidental death of a hockey teammate. Trent grapples with issues of self-loathing, guilt, and rage as he begins his journey of healing through friendship. This 2015 middle grade novel is Graff’s eighth full-length children’s book and was chosen for Amazon’s 2015 Best Book list.

This guide refers to the 2015 Puffin paperback edition of the novel.

Content Warning: The source text and this guide discuss accidental death and trauma.

Plot Summary

Trent Zimmerman is about to start sixth grade, but he’s still in a dark place because he feels responsible for Jared Richards’s death back in February. Trent hit a hockey puck at a bad angle, sending it into Jared’s chest. Jared had an unknown heart defect, and the blow killed him. Trent hasn’t played sports or spent time with any of his former friends since the accident. He wants to join the pickup baseball games at the park, but he’s not sure he’s welcome. Instead, he draws pictures in his “Book of Thoughts” to alleviate his endless overthinking.

One day, Fallon Little, a girl with a prominent scar across her face, rescues Trent from a confrontation with his former teammates. She asks about the drawings in his book, but he leaves without telling her. Afterward, he and his brothers go to dinner with their dad and pregnant stepmother, Kari. Trent has had a rocky relationship with his dad since the accident and has trouble controlling his emotions. When he gets angry, he feels a fire in his chest and acts out. Because of tensions between him and his father, Trent storms out of dinner and threatens to walk home. His older brother, Aaron, picks him up on the way back.

When school starts, Trent antagonizes his teacher, Ms. Emerson, and gets detention on purpose to avoid going to dinner with his dad again. During a basketball game in PE, Trent’s arms get clammy and he can’t breathe. He lashes out when the ball is taken from him and damages a soccer ball rack. Trent refuses to participate in PE going forward.

At school, Fallon finds him, asks him to draw her a picture, and tells him made-up stories about her scar. They talk about baseball movies, and she invites him over to watch some. Trent is confused about why she wants to be his friend because he feels like a “screw-up.” Still, he goes to Fallon’s house after school to avoid dinner with his dad. Fallon is a cinephile and loves finding continuity errors, and she teaches Trent how to spot them. Trent likes hanging out with her. Eventually, they make an official movie club so that Trent always has a place to go instead of dinner with his dad.

Their friendship develops as they watch movies, and Trent sees that Fallon is good at impressions. When he suggests that she should be an actress, he realizes that she probably considered it but decided against it because of her scar. He asks how she got the scar—the real story, not one of her tales—but she won’t tell him and makes him promise not to ask again. When Fallon invites Trent to celebrate her birthday at an amusement park, their friendship deepens. They discuss what happened with Jared, and Fallon tells him that he shouldn’t feel guilty because it was an accident. Trent feels that people must feel guilty when they do something bad, and killing someone is objectively bad.

As his friendship with Fallon develops, Trent continues to be bullied. One day, Jeremiah Jacobson and Trent’s former friend Noah Gorman take his and Fallon’s table at lunch. When Fallon insists that they sit there anyway, Jeremiah bullies Fallon by putting mashed potatoes in her seat and insulting her clothes. Trent wants to retaliate, but Fallon won’t let him. She washes up in Ms. Emerson’s room, and Trent is surprised that she likes Ms. Emerson because he has such a bad rapport with her. Trent tries to join intramural baseball after school, but the sound of a cracking bat makes him start sweating and hyperventilating, so he flees.

Trent’s trauma also manifests in a difficult home life. When Trent finds out that his brother Doug is friends with Jared’s sister, Annie, he feels self-conscious. One day, Aaron, Doug, and Annie prank Trent by putting hot sauce in his soup, which results in Trent angrily throwing his soup bowl across the table. Another time, the brothers go to their dad’s house to meet their newborn sister. When Trent notices that Kari won’t let him hold the baby, he pushes the issue and tries to figure out why. When the baby begins to cry, Trent’s dad gets mad and yells at him, saying that he will never be able to hold his sister. Trent can’t figure out what he did wrong, but he feels the fire inside him and smashes a milk carton. His mother is disappointed in Trent for behaving meanly, and she tells him that he is hiding his true self. Eventually, Trent’s mom tells Trent that she wants him to stay at his dad’s place because she thinks he needs his father. However, Trent’s dad refuses to let Trent come live with him, and Trent feels angry and rejected.

Trent learns that he is failing PE because he is not participating. Ms. Emerson tells him that he must join intramural baseball or a community program to make up the credit, and he chooses the community program. Ms. Emerson tells Trent that he can talk to any teacher he trusts in the school, but he is not ready to talk yet.

Trent hits a low point when he and Fallon go to a movie and run into Jeremiah at the theater. When Jeremiah insults Fallon, Trent beats him up, which scares Fallon. She runs away, and when Trent tracks her down, she tells him about her recurring nightmares in which she’s being chased and can’t scream. She worries that she can’t scream in real life. She’s upset that Trent got violent, and she is distant with him after that.

When Trent learns that Fallon’s parents have forbidden her from hanging out with him because of his violent outbursts, he seeks Ms. Emerson’s advice. She teaches him how to make amends with people through the metaphor of watering plants, describing how people and friendships also need to be nurtured. She has Trent stay after school to water her plants each day. When Trent attends the community program for his PE grade, he is partnered with Annie Richards. Although Annie makes it clear that she hates Trent, he is able to diffuse the situation with empathy and humor, and the two get along.

Trent continues watering Ms. Emerson’s plants, and she advises him to tell the truth whenever he chooses to speak. He applies this advice to ask for forgiveness from Fallon’s parents. Her dad tells him that he must earn Fallon’s trust back, so he draws pictures of Fallon like she asked him to. He presents them to her, which makes her happy. He also takes her to a secluded island in the middle of the lake so that she can test her scream. They scream together, and Fallon is overjoyed to have found her voice.

At the end of the book, Trent overcomes his sports anxiety and joins intramural baseball. He encourages Fallon to ask for a bigger part in the school play, and she lands an understudy role for the lead part. Trent realizes that both of their stories are not over. As the novel closes, Fallon takes Trent aside and tells him the real story of how she got her scar.