I'm Still Here: Black Dignity in a World Made for Whiteness

Named after her grandmother’s maiden name, Brown realizes early in life that her first name—Austin—is more commonly associated with boys than girls. At age seven, she also realizes her first name causes people to expect her to be White. She learns this during an encounter with a suspicious librarian who questions whether her library card belongs to her.

Following this incident, Brown asks her mother why she and her father named her Austin. When her mother trots out the same familiar story about her grandmother’s maiden name, Brown cuts her off: “Momma, I know how you came up with my name, but why did you choose it?” (14). Her mother admits that she and her father hoped when future hiring managers look at Brown’s resume, they will think she is a White man and therefore be more likely to offer her an interview.

Though her parents’ plan works, it leads to several uncomfortable moments with hiring managers. This discomfort doesn’t end when Brown lands a job. The routine is always the same: A supervisor assures her it is safe to talk about any racist actions she observes. That same person goes on to admit to the company’s many imperfections and to assure Brown that employees who say or do racist things—which the supervisor is careful to characterize as “missteps”—are dealt with accordingly.