Hopeless

“I become weaker as my tears grow stronger, consuming me. I become nothing more than a vessel for the tears that won’t stop shedding.”

The opening chapter drops the reader into the night that Holder and Sky almost make love. Here, Sky recounts her panic over the near-touch of Holder, an anxiety she cannot explain even as it implodes what was otherwise a romantic evening. At this point, she defines herself only by her weakness.

“Why, if I’m not into this, do I let him do it? I’ve never had any emotional connection to guys I make out with. Or rather the guys that make out with me.”

Because she has not begun to reinvestigate her childhood, Sky confesses she is confused why such typical teen experiences do not affect her. She wonders why she does not feel anything for boys, even as Grayson makes his move.

“It’s simply him. Everything about him, from his tousled dark hair, to his stark blue eyes, to that dimple, to his thick arms that I just want to reach out and touch. Sky, get ahold of yourself.”

Love/attraction at first sight defines Sky’s first day in high school. Always homeschooled, she immerses herself in noise—including nasty whispers about her—but the sight of Holder in the crowd mesmerizes her. This is an experience she never had at home, and hence her consternation over its vast impact.