62 pages • 2 hours read
Hidden Pictures
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Themes
Addiction, Faith, Guilt, and Shame
When the novel begins, Mallory is 18 months sober. She quickly establishes that neither she nor the reader can rely on her narration, no matter how honest she wishes to be in the text. Once she reveals that the words of Hidden Pictures comprise a book that Teddy/Flora may read, it is obvious that Mallory has no interest in hiding her own possible deficiencies.
Mallory may be susceptible to false memories, rather than engaging with shame in a constructive way. Russell says that “an addict’s brain will ‘remember’ happy fantasies so we can avoid dwelling on real memories—all the shameful things we did to get high, all the shitty ways we hurt good people who loved us” (5). This is why it is easier for Mallory to lie to Adrian than to lead with the truth about herself. She prefers the fantasy in which she kept her running scholarship and did not lose her sister and mother. However, Mallory’s addiction can be fought. Her recovery program, her faith, and Russell’s support give her a support system that works against the shame and helps her move on. Mallory is in the proactive business of healing.
Contrasting with Mallory’s honest evaluation of her actions is the fantasy world constructed by Ted. He pretends that he is a desirable, influential businessman who has the respect of his industry, employees, wife, and son. Instead, his business is struggling, his wife sleeps in another room, he has a child as the result of a kidnapping and murder, and he soothes himself with alcohol and daydreams about the life he and Mallory will have together.
A large part of Mallory’s frustration comes from the fact that her addiction began innocently. Her experience with Oxycontin and its results serves as a miniature commentary on the modern opioid crisis. She begins using prescribed painkillers because of a running-related condition. However, she becomes dependent and uses them past the point where they are mere painkillers. She needs drugs to function and descends into other dangerous behaviors to sustain her habit. Mallory becomes more of an appetite than a person, which is why her recovery is complicated. Mallory’s recovery encourages her to become herself again and to relearn her identity in the absence of the drugs that defined her. Her faith gives her a useful lens into her sense of purpose, as well as her willingness to sacrifice herself to care for another.
However, her shame at Beth’s death has a different source, although it is equally insidious to her progress. Mallory wrecks while distracted by her phone, opening a new source of pain that she cannot blame on her addiction. When she sees Margit while bound in the cottage, Mallory thinks she hears the ghost tell her that it is not her fault. After Margit avenges her death by killing Caroline, she vanishes, implying that she can now pursue her own form of peace and recovery.
The Tension Between Faith, Fantasy, and Science
Mallory is a Christian, which helps her with her recovery program and its concept of surrendering to a higher power. However, when she arrives at the Maxwells’ home, one of their major rules is that she does not discuss anything metaphysical or religious with Teddy: “No religion or superstition. Teach science” (15). Ted will not even indulge in the idea of the Tooth Fairy. Mallory recalls, “A few nights ago, Teddy spat up a loose molar, and Ted just reached into his billfold and pulled out a dollar—no mystery, no fanfare, no late-night tiptoeing into the bed to avoid detection” (79). The Maxwells here hope to repress the possibility of the supernatural by strict adherence to what can be seen and proven, but this adherence will backfire when Margit breaks through the metaphysical barrier of the afterlife by the end of the novel.
Hidden Pictures uses an inventive misdirection with Caroline and Ted. They talk the loudest and the most disdainfully about faith, religion, and the supernatural, all while being on the run from, and under siege by, a ghost. They scorn Mitzi’s claims about her connection to the spirit world, even though they know the supernatural exists because it exists with them in their home. Yet they aggressively and naïvely insist on science and empiricism, which serves only as a pantomime. They are naïve enough to believe that they can outdistance, or ignore, an entity that does not obey natural laws. They feel they can protect themselves (and Teddy) from coming to terms with their crime if they can hide under the guide of science rather than acquiescing to the supernatural.
Mitzi’s character is not devoutly faithful to any particular deity or faith. Rather, her spiritualism largely serves to make her look foolish, which gives the Maxwells a reason to publicly dismiss her belief in the supernatural. She is such a caricature of a “new-age hippy” that it is easy and natural to doubt her claims about psychic powers, the existence of ghosts, and her professed insider knowledge of the Maxwells. Mitzi’s commitment to spirituality costs her life when Caroline and Ted kill her.
Mallory has had so many negative experiences, and has suffered such damage, that the statistics about her future could be grim. However, because faith requires a hope in things that are not seen—or that are not seen yet—Mallory can trust that better things are in store for her if she tries to live according to her values. Science may not provide all the answers that she needs, but her participation in the research study shows that she is open to all forms of knowledge. Mallory also acknowledges that faith may not always be able to answer her questions perfectly.
The Relationship Between Forgiveness and Recovery
The characters in Hidden Pictures struggle with their recovery from various situations and pains, which often coincide with their need or inability to forgive themselves. Each character must answer the question of what it means to forgive and recover from trauma according to their own needs.
Early in the novel, Mallory writes, “A big part of recovery—probably the most important part—is owning your past and acknowledging all the mistakes you’ve made. But I have to say it feels pretty nice to embrace the fantasy, to pretend I’m still a normal teenager with normal teenage dreams” (57). Part of the work of recovery is to acknowledge her mistakes while also not wallowing in shame, which is against the point of the recovery program. Mallory is not always convinced that she deserves to be forgiven for her mistakes, her misdeeds, and her role in Beth’s death. Mallory’s Christian faith is the most obvious symbol of forgiveness in the novel. Mallory is also a believer, and her belief in God helps her believe that she is not a lost cause. Her recovery program has a set of formalized steps that allow her to make amends, where possible, and to forgive herself.
Russell is her mentor and sponsor and the closest thing she has to an authority figure, but he must also struggle with guilt and forgiveness. He killed someone with his car while on meth, spent five years in prison, and can never change it. By simply continuing to exist, he must grapple with that responsibility without letting it ruin the remainder of his life. Similarly, Margit must forgive herself for her focus on her art when her daughter was abducted. If either Russell or Margit had only wallowed in self-pity for their mistakes rather than moving past them, Russel would not be able to help others through his program and Margit would not have been able to help Flora reunite with her rightful father and reclaim her identity.
Caroline and Ted are in desperate need of emotional recovery, but they do not have a system to use for progress, particularly since their guilt arises from unprovoked crimes for which no restitution can be made. Caroline says, “I’m not saying I don’t feel guilty. I do feel guilty. I feel remorse. I’m not proud of what happened. But she didn’t leave me with a choice” (329). This is not the attitude of someone who is making a good faith effort at accountability, but a desperate attempt to redirect the blame for a heinous act that ended Margit’s life while robbing a child of its mother.
Near the conclusion, Mallory writes to Flora, “Your doctors were astonished by the fact that you had no memory of being roused from bed, dragged into the woods, and pushed up a tree. They concluded that your brain had repressed these memories as a response to the trauma” (359). As the novel ends, Flora is now beginning the journey toward her own recovery. Because she may never recover her worst memories, perhaps Flora is in the best position to experience true recovery: Because she has done no wrong, she has nothing to forgive herself for. Time may be enough to heal her.
Mallory must persist in her own recovery proactively. Her reconciliation with her mother, and her mother’s success in breaking her cigarette addiction, are optimistic signs. Forgiveness can happen quickly in certain circumstances. Recovery can be a life’s work, depending on the nature and extent of the damage.
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