50 pages • 1 hour read
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Because most of Christie’s therapy is focused on improving her dating life, a significant portion of the text explores the importance and difficulty of forming connections. Early on, Tate shares an experience of being ostracized from a friend group at 11: “By then, I knew something was off in the connection between me and other people. I sensed in my gut that I didn’t know how to stay connected, how not to be cast aside” (11). She internalizes that difficulty forming connections is specific to her. She knows others can form and maintain relationships, but she struggles to do so herself, and this leads to self-blame.
The importance of connection is reflected in the choices Christie makes as she forms relationships and seeks out therapy. One of the reasons Christie decides to try therapy in the first place is remembering the experience of an ex-boyfriend, Blake, who saw Dr. Rosen in a group-therapy setting. In general, Christie doesn’t like or want Blake, but she does want the “tight bonds” (15) he formed with his group members for herself. She has the challenging task of bonding with people in groups that have already been together for some time, even years in the case of her third group.
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