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In this final chapter, Grant introduces Derek Sorenson, an athlete turned contract negotiator who was voted Most Ruthless in his negotiation class. Sorenson’s approach to negotiation was purely competitive, with a win-at-all-costs mentality. Once he realized that his tactics were only leading to short-term gains and long-term damage to his relationships and reputation, Sorenson decided to shift his approach. Grant describes how Sorenson was actually a giver who, over time, learned to adopt a taker approach during his time as an athlete. Sorenson’s transformation from a ruthless negotiator to a giver—his innate reciprocity style—shows that people can embrace giving qualities despite societal pressures and norms that may push them toward being a taker.
Grant acknowledges that many givers hide their natural reciprocity style for fear of being perceived as weak. However, he points out that even in seemingly competitive environments like negotiation, a winner-take-all approach is not the most effective one; givers can utilize their strengths to achieve better outcomes. He cites a study that found that the most intelligent negotiators are the ones who achieve win-win outcomes by considering the interests of both parties involved.
Grant encourages givers to embrace their giving nature.
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