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In Chapter 37, “Fantasies,” Martin once again explains the escape that imagination provided him from his pain and trauma during the years he was unable to communicate with the outside world. Having divulged the more nefarious details of the abuse he endured, this escape into his imagination became all the more necessary for him. In his mind, he could be a “a pilot, a space raider or a Formula One driver, a merman, a secret agent, or a Jedi warrior with mind-reading powers” (158). Along with his fantasies, he retreated into his mind in order to connect with God, who as Martin writes, “didn’t need proof that I existed—He knew I did” (161). Chapters 38 (“A New Friend”) and 39 (“Will He Ever Learn?”) revolve around Kojak, a big yellow Labrador that Martin’s parents adopt to be Martin’s dog. Kojak is boisterous and clumsy, but Martin loves him dearly. After being alone for so long, Martin revels in his new companion. He writes:
But whatever his shortcomings, Kojak is what I wanted him to be: a companion who always makes me smile with his unfailing cheerfulness and loving nature. Whatever mistakes he makes, his presence has made my world a far happier place (168).
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