Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing

“If you like, you can consider what you’re about to read to be a message from the beyond, my beyond.”

At the beginning of the memoir, Perry presents himself as a ghost returned to life to tell his story. The image emphasizes the near-death experiences caused by his addiction and his survival against the odds. The declaration also illustrates the author’s habit of directly addressing the reader.

“I have lived half my life in one form or another of treatment center or sober living house. Which is fine when you are twenty-four years old, less fine when you are forty-two years old. Now I was forty-nine, still struggling to get this monkey off my back.”

Providing context to his ruptured colon, Perry conveys the duration of his struggle with substance use. He explains that, despite spending a significant portion of his life in treatment, he is still battling addiction as he approaches 50. The “monkey” on his back is a commonly used metaphor to describe the tenacity of addiction.

“I don’t write all this so anyone will feel sorry for me—I write these words because they are true. I write them because someone else may be confused by the fact that they know they should stop drinking—like me, they have all the information, and they understand the consequences—but they still can’t stop drinking. You are not alone, my brothers and sisters.”

Here, Perry outlines his motivation for writing the memoir. He clarifies that his book is not intended to evoke readerly sympathy. Instead, he hopes his story will speak to people living with addiction and alleviate their sense of isolation. Perry directly addresses and aligns himself with this readership by referring to them as “my brothers and sisters.”