Forgive Me, Leonard Peacock

Leonard, having surveilled Asher Beal’s house, waits for him to arrive home at a precise time that evening. From Asher’s backyard Leonard watches his “target” (171) using his computer. He tries to forget Asher’s humanity and envisions shooting him seven times in the head and chest. Following the murder, Leonard will kill himself using the P-38’s final bullet.

Leonard compares the nighttime cold to death. He remembers Hamlet’s famous words about the afterlife, “What dreams / may come?” (173). Leonard would prefer “Übernothing” (174) rather than an afterlife. 

Asher’s mother makes dinner through the Beals’ bay window. Leonard pretends he is watching a film called “Mrs. Beal Makes Her Perverted Son His Last Meal” (175). In a footnote, Leonard recalls Mrs. Beal’s inattentiveness throughout his and Asher’s friendship. Once, while Leonard ate with Asher and Mrs. Beal at a restaurant, Asher pranked the server. Mrs. Beal appeared not to notice Asher’s behavior, which Leonard watched with contempt. 

Leonard remembers how Mrs. Beal always provided pizza and sang songs from Cats. He imagines her finding Asher dead in his room. He wonders if Mrs. Beal’s lack of intervention contributed to his and Asher’s conflict. Leonard considers the

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