Diary of a Wimpy Kid

“Mom is always saying I’m a smart kid, but that I just don’t ‘apply’ myself.”

Greg is a precocious child, and he seems very observant about the world around him. Although he is intelligent, Greg is chronically lazy, and he doesn’t like to do more work than is necessary. He gets through school by putting forth minimal effort, and this theme of “doing the minimum” follows him throughout his adventures in the novel. Greg wants great recognition but wants to do very little to actually earn this recognition.

“Rowley is technically my best friend, but that is definitely subject to change.”

Greg is very worried about being popular, and when he introduces his best friend Rowley, Greg wastes no time in telling the reader Rowley is less popular than him. Greg seems to believe he is doing Rowley a big favor by hanging out with him, and Greg even admits he has no allegiance to Rowley. If a cooler best friend option comes along, Greg is more than willing to trade up and ditch Rowley. This is ironic because at the end of the novel Rowley is the one who abandons Greg and leaves him to fend for himself.

“By the time we finished putting the flyers up around the neighborhood and got back to Rowley’s basement, it was already 2:30, and we hadn’t even started putting the actual haunted house together yet. So we had to cut some corners from our original plan.”

Greg has a habit of creating half-baked schemes that promise much and deliver little. When he and Rowley decide to create a haunted house, they spend so much time coming up with cool ideas and advertising around the neighborhood that they never actually get around to building the haunted house. Instead of learning how to plan more effectively, Greg blames others when his plans fall apart.

“I think next Halloween I’ll just stay home and mooch some Butterfingers from the bowl Mom keeps on top of the refrigerator.”

After the complete failure of Halloween night, Greg and Rowley find themselves empty-handed when Greg’s dad throws water on them and ruins their candy. Greg decides that instead of going to all the trouble to plan the perfect trick-or-treating route next year, he’ll take the easy way out and stay home. The disaster of Halloween night seems to convince Greg that putting in any effort isn’t worth it and creating goals doesn’t pay off in the end.

“I’ve never been all that interested in getting in shape before, but this wrestling unit has made me rethink things.”

Greg admits he never had an interest in getting into shape until the wrestling unit, but once he realizes he’ll have to wrestle Fregley every day for the next month and a half, Greg starts to think of a way out. He fails to realize that getting into shape and building muscle requires time and discipline, and Greg is too impatient to invest this amount of energy into anything for very long. Even his parents seem to suspect Greg won’t follow through on this commitment, and they refuse to give in to his whims.

“I made Rowley use the bench press first, mostly because I wanted to see if the broomstick was going to hold up.”

Greg and Rowley’s friendship has an unusual power dynamic. Greg often treats Rowley like a test subject, and in this case Greg asks Rowley to test his homemade weight-lifting equipment first to see if it actually works. Rowley agrees, but Greg quickly turns it into a painful, unpleasant experience for Rowley by forcing him to work out beyond his comfort level.

“I guess you can’t expect everyone to have the same kind of dedication as you.”

When Rowley gives up on the weight-lifting game and decides to go home, Greg states that Rowley isn’t as dedicated as he is. This statement is ironic, because Rowley was the one who had to use the homemade gym equipment and was almost seriously injured in the process. Greg never bothered to test his own gear, and yet he still considers himself to be better than Rowley, which shows his arrogance and selfishness. This foreshadows the incident with the Big Wheel that will come into play in January.

“I BEGGED her not to make me sign up. Those school plays are always musicals, and the last thing I need is to have to sing a solo in front of the whole school.”

Greg’s plea with his mother reveals a rare moment of vulnerability. Greg doesn’t want to do the school play because he is afraid of being embarrassed on stage. He is frightened by the idea of having to sing in public, especially in front of his classmates, and the reader is reminded that Greg struggles with feelings of self-consciousness like most kids his age. He may put on a mask of arrogance, but deep down Greg is deeply afraid of public humiliation.

“I’m going to sign up to be a Tree, because 1) they don’t have to sing and 2) they get to bean Dorothy with apples.”

This proclamation is ironic because right after Greg finds out he is going to be a Tree, he discovers he will have to sing a song with the other Trees. He also learns his costume won’t have arm holes, so he won’t be throwing apples at Dorothy after all. Greg’s best-laid plan once again fails to come to fruition.

“I knew that if I sang the song and Rodrick recorded it, he would keep the tape forever and use it to humiliate me for the rest of my life.”

Greg’s deep-seated fears of public humiliation become a reality when he sees Rodrick preparing to record his performance in the school play. Greg is so terrified of the idea of being made fun of by his brother that he brings the performance to a halt when he refuses to sing. For Greg, being teased by his brother is far worse than having the entire town see him freeze up on stage, and at this moment, Greg isn’t thinking clearly about the consequences of his actions. He ends up ruining the play for everyone but believes he avoided humiliation.

“We went back inside, and Rowley showed me his Christmas loot. He sure got a lot more stuff than I did.”

Greg’s mistreatment of Rowley may be rooted in jealousy. Unlike Greg, Rowley is an only child, and his family has more money than the Heffleys. At the end of Christmas day, Greg didn’t receive many presents while Rowley got almost everything he wanted. Greg never directly says he is jealous of Rowley, but his behavior seems to indicate jealousy may be a factor.

“I finally knocked Rowley off the Big Wheel today, but it didn’t happen the way I expected.”

When Greg knocks Rowley off the Big Wheel, he wasn’t expecting to hurt his friend. Greg even tries to cheer Rowley up after the incident, but Rowley is in too much pain. Still, Greg doesn’t seem to feel much guilt, and if anything he is more worried about trying to cover up his actions to avoid getting into trouble.

“I realized Rowley’s injury thing is a pretty good racket, so I decided it was time for me to have an injury of my own.”

When Greg learns Rowley’s hand is broken, he still feels no remorse or guilt for his role in the incident. Instead, Greg becomes visibly jealous of the attention Rowley is getting. He decides to fake an injury in hopes of getting the same kind of attention, but this backfires on him when the only person who wants to give him any attention is Fregley.

“I WANTED to sign up for Home Economics 2, because I was pretty good at Home Ec 1. But being good at sewing does not exactly buy you popularity points at school.”

Throughout the novel, Greg mentions having past interests that resulted in him getting bullied. At this moment, he remembers taking Home Economics and enjoying it but points out that he was bullied for carrying around an embroidered bag. Greg’s fear of embarrassment has taken away many of his interests and passions, and he is left struggling to find something he enjoys that doesn’t involve hurting other people.

“I couldn’t believe my luck. I was getting instant bully protection and a free pass from half of Pre-Algebra, and I didn’t even have to lift a finger.”

Greg sees his Safety Patrol job as a quick fix to his problems. He fears being bullied, and he knows being a member of the Safety Patrol means he will be safe from bullies. He also isn’t the best student, so he knows he can use the Safety Patrol job to miss class. For Greg, the perks of the Safety Patrol are the only things he thinks about, and the actual responsibilities are of little to no concern to him.

“So tomorrow morning, when the Whirley Street kids come marching up our hill, me and Rowley are going to teach those guys a lesson.”

During the snow day, Greg and Rowley start to build the world’s biggest snowman, but they quickly lose heart when the project becomes too daunting. Instead, they decide to roll their giant snowball down the hill to wipe out the kids trying to sled in their neighborhood. Greg claims they will teach the kids a lesson, but it seems that he is using this situation to play another prank on an unsuspecting group of kids who aren’t doing any harm.

“Dad was heading for my snowball, not me. And in less than a minute, he reduced all our hard work to nothing.”

On the day Greg and Rowley plan to roll the giant snowball down the hill, Greg kicks over Manny’s snowman, and his dad sees it happen. Greg’s father punishes him for bullying his little brother by destroying Greg and Rowley’s snowball, and to Greg’s disbelief Rowley is angry with Greg for doing something to cause his father to punish him in that way in the first place. This is a rare moment where Greg’s bullying has a direct consequence that affects another person. Rowley was excited to roll the giant snowball down the hill, but Greg ruined it for him.

“‘Wacky Dawg’ made Bryan Little a celebrity at our school, and I wanted to get in on some of that kind of fame.”

Greg’s fixation on the school newspaper cartoonist job is motivated purely by a desire to be popular. He believes if he can get the job, he will achieve the same level of fame as Bryan Little. Greg becomes so focused on this venture that he is willing to play dirty and insult his friend in the process, and this is when the cracks begin to form in his friendship with Rowley.

“Eventually I got kind of sick of the ‘Zoo-Wee Mama’ idea and I pretty much let Rowley take over the whole operation.”

Greg and Rowley may have created “Zoo-Wee Mama” together, but Greg states that as soon as Rowley wanted to be more involved in the actual writing of the comic strip, Greg lost interest. He claims Rowley’s ideas weren’t funny, and he didn’t want to work on a project he didn’t have complete control over. Greg is shocked to learn later that Rowley’s comic strips are popular at school, and Greg feels threatened by his friend’s success.

“It had rained that morning, and there were a lot of worms on the sidewalk. So I decided to have some fun with the kids.”

The worm-chasing incident highlights two important aspects of Greg’s personality that ultimately lead to his downfall and his loss of Safety Patrol privileges. First, the incident shows Greg is willing to terrorize small children, just like he tries to terrorize Manny. Greg enjoys the perks of being a Safety Patrol officer, but he takes no special interest in protecting the children he oversees.

“I decided the right thing to do was to just let Rowley take one for the team this time around.”

The other important aspect of Greg’s personality that leads to his downfall is his willingness to let his best friend take the blame for his own mistakes. Greg knows Rowley is innocent, but he still lets Rowley suffer the consequences. Although Greg has some initial misgivings about letting Rowley “take one for the team,” he quickly talks himself out of feeling guilty and pushes aside any feelings of remorse. In fact, he tells Rowley the only lesson he learned was to not get caught next time.

“Rowley has been TOTALLY giving me the cold shoulder lately. And that’s really lame, because if I recall correctly, HE’S the one that sold ME out.”

After Rowley comes forward and tells the truth about what happened with the worm-chasing incident, Greg still struggles to accept responsibility for what he did. Instead of understanding why Rowley is upset with him, Greg blames Rowley and says his friend needs to learn a thing or two about loyalty. The irony is completely lost on Greg: He was willing to let his best friend get in trouble for something he did, which is the opposite of loyalty.

“If the truth ever came out about how the Cheese disappeared, Rowley would be finished.”

Although Greg has been a terrible friend throughout the novel, he has a rare moment of insight in the final chapters. Greg’s own fear around the Cheese and the Cheese Touch leads him to feel sorry for Rowley. He realizes that Rowley’s reputation would be ruined if anyone found out he ate the cheese, and even though they are still fighting, Greg decides to use his dishonest nature for good.