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Daring Greatly opens with Brown telling her therapist how uncomfortable she is being vulnerable. Brown is aware that vulnerability increases the quality of people’s lives, but she has spent her entire life actively trying to avoid vulnerability. In her late twenties, Brown quit a management job at AT&T and went back to school for social work, waiting tables to pay for her tuition. Her training in social work teaches her that social work isn’t about fixing people or systems but rather it opens up an empathic space that allows people to find their own path. She focuses on research that quantifies outcomes, which satisfies her desire for control. She earns a BSW, MSW, and Ph.D. in social work, which leaves her with one takeaway: “We are hardwired to connect with others, it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives, and without it there is suffering” (xxii). Brown becomes a specialist in connection, but she quickly realizes that her research subjects focused more on shame, heartbreak, and betrayal, so she begins to study shame and empathy.
A key question in her research is: What do people who resist shame and believe in their own worthiness have in common? Brown calls these people “the Wholehearted.
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By Brené Brown