Dare to Lead

Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts. is a self-help book for professionals written by American researcher and lecturer Brené Brown. The text explores how to become a “daring” leader who motivates and inspires employees to develop their skills and fulfill their fullest potential, highlighting the importance of Vulnerability, Honest Communication, and Operationalizing Courage.

Brown, who is trained in social work and has a PhD in philosophy, bases much of her advice on her own research in professional leadership but also weaves in findings from other psychologists. She provides anecdotes from her personal life and includes the perspectives of renowned leaders to demonstrate how her tools have been successfully implemented in various workplaces. Her other notable works include Atlas of the Heart (2021), The Gifts of Imperfection (2010), and Daring Greatly (2012).

This study guide refers to the Kindle edition of the book.

Summary

Brown wrote Dare to Lead to combine her ideas and research findings from previous books into one volume that contains practical tools and advice for professionals. She argues that the best leaders are kind and courageous, and that they focus on finding and developing their colleagues’ potential.

Her recommendations include strategies for healing dysfunctional or hostile workplace cultures to create a trusting, communicative environments. Brown argues that by accepting vulnerability and approaching their work with curiosity, open-mindedness, and courage, leaders can create safe spaces for their colleagues to communicate honestly and collaborate more productively.

She identifies 10 toxic workplace behaviors—such as blaming others, avoiding candid communication, and being defined by failures—and describes how they manifest in the workplace. In contrast, she introduces the four key skills that will shape her book: “Rumbling with Vulnerability, Living into Our Values, Braving Trust, Learning to Rise” (10). The book is divided into four parts organized around these key stills.

Part 1, “Rumbling with Vulnerability,” comprises five chapters. The first, titled “The Moment and the Myths,” addresses the myth that vulnerability is the same as weakness. Instead, Brown argues that acknowledging vulnerability is a courageous act that has enormous benefits for leaders as well as their workplace culture. She also debunks other myths about vulnerability.

In the following chapter, “The Call to Courage,” Brown makes the case for honest communication at work. She uses the term “rumble” to refer to meetings where staff feel comfortable discussing failures without fear of shaming or blaming. She encourages leaders to “rumble” with their own staff and to ensure everyone communicates respectfully during meetings. Brown also introduces “Permission Slips,” a tool used in meetings to encourage thoughtful communication.

In Chapter 3, “The Armory,” Brown discusses how everyone uses emotional “armor” to protect themselves. She argues that behaviors like perfectionism, cynicism, and fear of taking risks are all ways that we try to protect our egos from shame and failure. Brown uses the analogy of armor to show that we cannot succeed without being vulnerable, even though it makes us feel exposed and means that we may sometimes fail.

The author posits that armored or egotistical workplace behavior often results in “power over” dynamics in which management behaves in a controlling rather than collaborative manner. It can also cause “victim or viking” mentalities in which colleagues feel they must beat each other, lest they become the workplace “victim” (91).

In Chapter 4, “Shame and Empathy,” Brown explains that shame is an unavoidable universal feeling. The more we deny shame’s role in our psyche, the more power it has over our actions. The more shame we experience, the more likely we are to develop emotional armor and feel driven to hide our insecurities. Brown posits that empathy and self-compassion are positive ways to diminish shame and refocus on genuine growth rather than work to mask shortcomings.

Chapter 5, “Curiosity and Grounded Confidence,” advises readers on how to develop real confidence, which Brown contrasts with false confidence, which is actually “posturing” or “arrogance” (165). She argues that genuine confidence emerges when we acknowledge vulnerability, work through failures, and develop self-awareness.

Brown writes that growing up overprotected or underprotected can result in weak confidence, since sheltered kids often fear failure, while those left without guidance struggle to build skills and explore their potential. Approaching issues with curiosity helps to build confidence, since you focus on discovering new perspectives rather than defending your position and staying in your comfort zone.

In Part 2, “Living Your Values,” Brown explains how to identify and uphold core values. She writes that we should consistently uphold our values whether at work or home. Skilled leaders not only identify values that are important to their workplace culture but also give their colleagues specific guidance on how to embody these values in the office.

Part 3, “Braving Trust,” explores the issue of trust, which Brown calls a taboo topic in many workplaces. She advises professionals to use the BRAVING strategy to approach trust issues in a constructive way. This acronym stands for “Boundaries, Reliability, Accountability, Vault, Integrity, Nonjudgment, Generosity” (225).

Finally, in Part 4, “Learning to Rise,” Brown addresses the importance of helping young people grow from failure and mistakes. She shares a few strategies for developing emotional resilience during stressful times. Brown concludes her work by encouraging the reader to participate in the revolution of courageous and positive leadership.