Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It

In the conclusion of Chatter, Kross recounts how a student named Arielle questioned why emotional management techniques were taught so late in students’ education. This question gained additional significance when Kross’s four-year-old daughter came home upset about a playground incident, making him wonder if she too would someday ask why she hadn’t learned these crucial skills earlier.

Kross emphasizes that completely silencing one’s inner voice would be counterproductive. The inner voice serves essential functions in cognition and emotional processing, allowing people to reflect on decisions, control emotions, imagine futures, and maintain personal narratives. Even negative self-talk provides valuable warnings about potential dangers, similar to how physical pain signals threats to the body. The challenge isn’t eliminating negative self-talk but preventing it from becoming overwhelming.

This insight led Kross and colleagues to develop the “Toolbox Project,” a curriculum for middle and high school students. Their pilot study with 450 diverse students showed promising results, with students actively applying techniques like journaling, distanced self-talk, and reframing in their daily lives.

The tools discussed throughout the book include distancing techniques, distanced self-talk, leveraging social connections, spending time in nature, experiencing