A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man

Stephen becomes more religious. He prays every morning but fears that this alone may not be enough to make up for his litany of sins. Completely reworking his schedule, he finds time in the day to pray in many different ways. He rubs rosary beads in his pocket as he walks and reads religious texts about “the mystery of the Holy Trinity” (167). The subject remains complex, but the complexity reassures Stephen. Slowly, he comes to believe that he is loved by God. To Stephen, the entire world seems to be an extension of God’s love, but he cautions himself against getting carried away with his newfound spirituality. As well as avoiding eye contact with any woman, he tries to “mortify” (171) his senses. He mortifies his sense of smell, for example, by seeking out “an unpleasant odor” (172). These examples of self-discipline do not completely eliminate his temptations. He is occasionally impatient, and he thinks sinful thoughts. However, he does not act on any of these thoughts, and he praises himself for not giving in to the devil’s “frequent and violent temptations” (174). He hopes that he has turned his sinful life around.

When his vacation ends, Stephen returns to the Jesuit school.